I Am Thy Fool
by Squeeky Fromm
How do I worship thy One-derfulness?
Shall I measure slobber by the barrel,
Or celebrate thy Blessed Birth in carol
Circulated free by the Main Stream Press?
Or shall I be discreet, and not confess
Nor speak of fascination so feral?
Hiding away Love’s risque’ apparel
As if it were but some blue stain-ed dress.
Yet, when every momentary stutter
Or pregnant pause is cause for happiness,
Must I draw the shades and close the shutter?
There, in Dark, lest thrill’d legs and lips a-drool
Proclaim, in involuntary mutter
For all the world to know. . . I am thy Fool.
Here is the background for this Sonnet. This is from Skookum at Flopping Aces, and you can find all the links to the original story there:
MEGHAN DAUM, a reporter for the LA Times, has once again tried to promote this lost and forgotten cause or at least has decided to give the dead jackass another sound thrashing, by creative use of weak metaphors. In the true wide eyed form of the typical Useful Idiot that caused Stalin the only laughter in his life that we know of, she explains Obama’s apparent speech impediment without a teleprompter as a true sign of genius. Have patience, the Times actually gives her column space for this lunacy.
Admittedly, the president is given to a lot of pauses, “uhs” and sputtering starts to his sentences. As polished as he often is before large crowds (where the adjective “soaring” is often applied to his speeches), his impromptu speaking frequently calls to mind a doctoral candidate delivering a wobbly dissertation defense.
But consider this: It’s not that Obama can’t speak clearly. It’s that he employs the intellectual stammer. Not to be confused with a stutter, which the president decidedly does not have, the intellectual stammer signals a brain that is moving so fast that the mouth can’t keep up. The stammer is commonly found among university professors, characters in Woody Allen movies and public thinkers of the sort that might appear on C-SPAN but not CNN. If you’re a member or a fan of that subset, chances are the president’s stammer doesn’t bother you; in fact, you might even love him for it (he sounds just like your grad school roommate, especially when he drank too much Scotch and attempted to expound on the Hegelian dialectic!).
So the president’s inability to speak fluently without a tele-prompter and sounding like a drunk, according to Ms Daum, is a direct result of intellectual stammering, not to be confused with the more common stuttering that afflicts many mere mortals. Woody Allen, the man who married his daughter, portrays this genius in comedic form and that should help those of us that aren’t sycophants believe the lie. Well done, Ms Daum, your lies are so preposterous that people may be hesitant to laugh at them.
Here is the link to this HILARIOUS and well-written Internet Article, which inspired my Sonnet for the Romantic Obotski—I Am Thy Fool.: