Heather Has Two Citizen-Parent Mommies!!! (The Steubenite Birthers???)

Heather Would Be Eligible For The Presidency Because Both Of Her Mommies Were American Citizens

As a Girl Reporter, I often get strange comments, which I usually delete, like the spam comments. However, today, I got one that I decided to turn into an Internet Article. It is about a new school of thought about Vattel which I have never heard of, the Steubenites. A Gay Birther, who wishes simply to be known as “Patric’, The Patriot”  wrote me about his new website. Patric’ is upset because he feels the Birther Movement is trying to sweep its gay adherents under the carpet. As Patric’ said:

As a gay man, I believe we were the original birthers.  The reason why the clause was written was to keep Baron Von Steuben from being eligible for the presidency. I have always felt threatened by the concept that  only a natural born citizen could be President.  Well, Mr. Founding Fathers, let me just tell you that families come in all shapes, sizes, and genders! That language was meant to keep us barefoot, naked, and chained to the wrought iron bed. (Not that there is anything wrong with that if it is your choice.)  For centuries we were persecuted and discriminated against because we were supposedly un-natural.

It wasn’t the possibility that British or European nobility would simply buy an election that frightened them.  No, the Founders were very homophobic and were afraid that Baron von Steuben, who was gay, and always very well-attired with matching boots and scabbard, would become President some day. The French were always much more open-minded and tolerant of alternative life styles, so I say Vive la France, Vive la Vattel! Down with  natural and  up with  au naturale.

Patric’, The Patriot, also informed me that he is writing a new book, Heather Has Two Citizen-Parent Mommies which will explore the LGBT aspects of the issue and assure  children of non-traditional families that they too can grow up to be president.  As long as least two of their parental units are American citizens.

Here is Patric’s new website, The Gay Birther:


I report. You decide if it is real, or just a spoof.  Whatever, there is now definitely more camp, in the  Vattle Birther camp.

What a hoot!

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter


About Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter

Hi!!! I am a Girl Reporter on the Internet. I am 34. Plus I am a INTP. I have a Major in Human Kinetics, and a Minor in English. I have 2 cats, and a new kitten! I write poetry, and plus I am trying to learn how to play guitar. I think that is all??? Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter View all posts by Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter

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