The Curse Of Wong Kim Ark!!! (Or, No Tickee, No Birfapalooza)

Few Man Choose To Buy Tickets To The Birther Event???

Apparently, The Curse of Wong Kim Ark has struck once again, and a Birther event has been cancelled due to a lack of interest. And a lack of ticket sales. First, it was The Birther Summit back in March, and now it is:

(Click image to enlarge.)

Oh my, another epic Birther flop. Perhaps the Tea Party should just concentrate on politics and leave the stupid Birther crap alone??? Are you listening, Mark Gillar??? And to think this all started out sooo grand:

Anyway, we tracked down one of the nine ticket purchasers, who wishes to remain anonymous for the time being. He tells us that he has retained Dr. Orly Taitz, Esq. to file suit to get back the money he spent on clothes for the event:

Thinking Ahead, The Birther Even Bought A Flashlight So He Could Find His Butt In The Dark With Both Hands

Darn! I was really looking forward to reporting on this event.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Image. This is from the 1932 film, The Mask of Fu Man Chu, starring Boris Karloff and Myrna Loy. Wiki says, in part:

The Mask of Fu Manchu is a Pre-Code adventure film released in 1932, featuring Boris Karloff as Fu Manchu and Myrna Loyas his daughter. The movie revolves around Fu Manchu’s quest for the sword and mask of Genghis Khan. Lewis Stone plays his nemesis. Directed by Charles Brabin, it is considered the best of the Fu Manchu films produced in the 1930s.

Hint. There is more than one Easter Egg in this one.

Note 2. Links. I wrote two Internet Articles about this event.  Maybe the whole Human Sacrifice thing in the second one had some effect on ticket sales???

Note 3. Chinese Pidgin English  Wiki has an interesting short Internet Article about pidgin Chinese, which includes the “no tickee, no washee” thing I found at one of the links:

A Chinese woman living on the remote Salmon River in central Idaho is reported as finding humor in “Uncle Josh in a Chinese Laundry” as played on a neighbor’s wind-up phonograph about 1917.[20] Yankee humorist Cal Stewart performed as Uncle Josh Weathersby, resident of the small New England town of Pumpkin Centre. The dialect story was published in Uncle Josh’s Punkin Centre Stories (1903).[21] In this story, Uncle Josh is visiting New York and inquires about laundry services. He is directed to a nearby Chinese laundry:

So I told him I’d like to git him to do some washin’ fer me, and he commenced a talkin’ some outlandish lingo, sounded to me like cider runnin’ out of a jug, somethin’ like–ung tong oowong fang kai moi oo ung we, velly good washee. Wall I understood the last of it and jist took his word fer the rest, so I giv him my clothes and he giv me a little yeller ticket that he painted with a brush what he had, and I’ll jist bet a yoke of steers agin the holler in a log, that no livin’ mortal man could read that ticket; it looked like a fly had fell into the ink bottle and then crawled over the paper.

Not recognizing the ticket as his claim, and misdirected by a city slicker, Josh cannot produce the ticket when he calls for his laundry. The phrase “No tickee, no washhee” is not included. In spite of the laundryman’s protestations, Josh assaults him, and runs off with somebody else’s shirts, a part of the laundryman’s queue, with the laundryman yelling for the police behind him. Uncle Josh, as the rube, is gulled by the city slicker (by implication) and takes out his frustration on the innocent laundryman. I found this not much funnier with Stewart’s nasal Yankee dialect and characteristic laugh as part of the delivery.[22]

Mieder records the earliest documented use of “No tickee, no washee” as 1931[23]; which seems to be a half-century or so later than one would think. Because it is such a central concept to Cal Stewart’s dialect story, it is surprising he did not use the phrase. Does that mean that its use did not become widespread until after 1903 and before 1931? This would be contrary to the general expectation that the phrase originated in the late nineteenth century, probably in California.[24]

Note 4.  The Birther Clothes Image. This is actually Jackie Gleason playing Ralph Kramden in The Honeymooners, an old timey TV show. This episode is The Man From Space, and I found this blurb, at the link below where you can watch the whole episode:

The Man from Space 1955

Determined to win a $50 prize for “best costume” at the Raccoon’s annual Halloween party, Ralph tries to wheedle ten bucks out of Norton so that he can rent a Henry the Eighth outfit. But Norton also wants to rent a costume and turns Ralph down. Declaring war on Ed, Ralph decides to construct his own elaborate costume out of furniture and kitchen utensils. But Ralph’s jerry-built “Martian” outfit is no match for the winning costume — and we aren’t about to tell you what that is. Among other things, this episode reveals that Ed Norton’s personal idol is Pierre Francois de la Brioche, the man who designed and constructed the sewers of Paris (or so Ed thinks!). First telecast on December 31, 1955, “The Man from Space” was written by A.J. Russell and Herbert Finn.

Retroflix Honeymooners Episodes


About Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter

Hi!!! I am a Girl Reporter on the Internet. I am 31. Plus I am a INTP. I have a Major in Human Kinetics, and a Minor in English. I have 2 cats, and a new kitten! I write poetry, and plus I am trying to learn how to play guitar. I think that is all??? Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter View all posts by Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter

One response to “The Curse Of Wong Kim Ark!!! (Or, No Tickee, No Birfapalooza)

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