A Birther Mid-Summer’s Night Dream!!!


Reed Hayes Admits To The Girl Reporter That He Never Actually Examined The Real Document

The seasons come, and the seasons go. Life is a cycle, and once again mid summer is upon us. True to ancient rituals, the Birthers are cavorting about by moonlight in the woodlands and meadows of America, and in general making asses out of themselves(see Note 3 below) . This time, the ostensible reason is that a humble Hawaiian document examiner, Reed Hayes, may topple Obama.

The story is at over at Free Republic, and ORYR, and even being spread around the Internet in various comment sections. Inhibitions lowered by untaxed spirits will drive wild mating rituals.  Roofs will be raised in barns, and trailers will be set  a’ rocking from  Georgia to Oklahoma.  Nine months hence, new little Birthers will arrive, some with names like Reed and Reedella in honor of this year’s fertility god. But, it isn’t really the Reed Hayes story that is driving all this.  Because there isn’t a story. He bases his conclusion on some online images presented him by the Cold Case Posse. This latest round pheromone pumping began over at The Western Center For Journalism:

There have been many lawsuits challenging Barack Obama’s eligibility to be President—most based on the fact that Obama is not a natural born citizen, his father being a Kenyan. Other lawsuits challenge the validity of Obama’s PDF long-form birth certificate, riddled with strange anomalies like multiple layers and eight different fonts.

The lawsuits have all crashed and burned in flames for two reasons: 1. The court hearing the lawsuits have treated the cases as a joke instead of a valid question of Constitutional requirements. And 2. The plaintiffs haven’t had Reed Hayes on their side.

Reed Hayes  is a forensic document expert who may be the man who finally brings down the Obama administration.

There is more such merriment at this link:


Here is the money quote:

Based on my observations and findings, it is clear the Certificate of Live Birth I examined is not a scan of an original paper birth certificate but a digitally manufactured document created by utilizing  material from various sources.

and a short video:

My GUESS is, that poor Reed Hayes already rues the day he ever decided he needed $50 badly enough to get in bed with Mike Zullo. Because Reed Hayes has never seen or touched the original document. And here the Birthers are, presenting him as someone who may topple the President. How is the poor man going to be able to go out in public after the Cold Case Posse heads for the Last Round Up, which ought to occur within the next few months? Because even the most stubborn Birther is getting fed up with “We are meeting with VIPs right now“, and “This is going to be REALLY BIG!“, and “Just keep sending us your money!

Particularly with Orly Taitz out there accusing Team Arpaio of having Low T, impotence,  performance anxiety, and fighting like girly-men.  There is nothing wrong with silly-season, as long as you know it’s silly. But no matter how much fun the fantasy, sooner or later you have to wake up. If I was the Birthers, I wouldn’t lose the flame-retardant long johns just yet.  And what was that Shakespeare said???

Shall we their fond documents see?
Lord, what fools these Birthers be!

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Image. This is James Cagney, playing the role of Bottom, in William Shakespeare’s 1935 film, A Midsummer’s Night Dream. Unable to find funding in Great Britain, Shakespeare brought the script to Hollywood. Warner Brothers snapped it up, but after a squabble with Hal Wallis, Shakespeare was denied the right to make any script changes, and any voice at all in casting the players. As he complained later, it was like he wasn’t even there. As Wiki notes:

Directed by Max Reinhardt and William Dieterle, and starring Ian Hunter, James Cagney, Mickey Rooney, Olivia de Havilland, Joe E. Brown, Dick Powell, and Victor Jory. Produced by Henry Blanke and Hal Wallis for Warner Brothers, and adapted by Charles Kenyon and Mary C. McCall Jr. from Reinhardt’s Hollywood Bowl production of the previous year, the film is about the events surrounding the marriage of the Duke of Athens, Theseus, and the Queen of the Amazons, Hippolyta. These include the adventures of four young Athenian lovers and a group of six amateur actors, who are controlled and manipulated by the fairies who inhabit the forest in which most of the story is set. The play, which is categorized as a comedy, is one of Shakespeare’s most popular works for the stage and is widely performed across the world. Felix Mendelssohn’s music was extensively used, as re-orchestrated by Erich Wolfgang Korngold. The ballet sequences featuring the fairies were choreographed by Bronislava Nijinska.

In the forest outside Athens, Oberon (Victor Jory), the king of the fairies, and Titania (Anita Louise) his queen, are having an argument. Titania tells Oberon that she plans to stay there to attend the wedding of Duke Theseus and Hippolyta. Wanting to punish Titania’s disobedience, Oberon instructs his mischievous court jester Puck (Mickey Rooney) to retrieve a flower called “love-in-idleness”. Originally a white flower, it turns purple when struck by Cupid’s bow. When someone applies the magical love potion to a sleeping person’s eyelids, it makes the victim fall in love with the first living creature seen upon awakening. Meanwhile, the mischievous Puck turns Bottom into a donkey. When Titania wakes up and lays eyes on Bottom as a donkey, she falls in love with him.

Note 2. Midsummer’s Night. Actual Midsummer’s Night occurs within a few days of the Summer Solstice, around June 24 in most countries. In contrast, Mid-Summer occurs sometime between June 21 and September 21.

Note 3. Ass. This is NOT a bad word!!! As noted by Gershon Legman, in one of his collections, I forget which one:

There once was a girl from Madras
Who had a magnificent ass!
Not rounded and pink
As you probably think.
It was gray, had long ears, and ate grass!

If you have never heard of Gershon Legman, see here:


Note 4. Other Reed Hayes articles:



About Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter

Hi!!! I am a Girl Reporter on the Internet. I am 34. Plus I am a INTP. I have a Major in Human Kinetics, and a Minor in English. I have 2 cats, and a new kitten! I write poetry, and plus I am trying to learn how to play guitar. I think that is all??? Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter View all posts by Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter

39 responses to “A Birther Mid-Summer’s Night Dream!!!

  • Jimmy

    ”The Certificate of Live Birth I examined is not a scan of an original paper birth certificate”

    Are you saying he could not know this without examining the original?

    • Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter

      Hi Jimmy!!!

      Not unless there is some kind of anomalous information contained in the document. For example, if the FONT type was a kind not invented in 1961. Or, if the name of the Registrar was Peter Rabbit.

      I did an article on this, about what you need to prove forgery. To date, there is not one single piece of information on the long form which the Cold Case Posse has shown to be false, or materially altered. That is why the prosecutor there won’t touch it.


      I also deposed Mike “The Arizona Kid” Zullo:

      Squeeky Fromm
      Girl Reporter

      • Jimmy

        So, even if the scan was created by utilizing material from various sources it could still pass as totally legit as long as there is nothing anomalous?.

        • Jim

          Ok Jimmy, think about it…what is important about the document? What is the whole REASON for the document?

        • Joel L. Lawler

          The State of Hawaii confirmed President Obama’s birth records, Jimmy. That’s the legal authority, so unless you’re a conspiracy theorist, that’s the end of the story.
          Don’t end up bitter and alone at the all-male review like Rambone, Jimmy. There’s still hope for you.

      • Jimmy

        Obfuscaters. This is once again in the tradition of Neil Abercrombie, right? Remember this one?

        This is the very definition of a birth certificate by affidavit available in 1961 in accordance with the Heath Statistics Act of 1955 for the Territory of Hawaii.

        • Jim

          Jimmy: “Remember this one? ”

          What one, all I see is your typing. Oh, and the law you’re bringing up in 1961, EVERY state has that sort of a law on their books. You know why, because back then a majority of the people were in agriculture…and guess what, not always could they leave their fields. And, of course, don’t forget things like snowstorms, tornadoes, blizzards, hurricanes, transportation…the reason people can’t immediately get to hospitals and such are endless. So Jimmy, since all states had similar laws, are you saying that nobody in America is eligible for President? Stupidity must be your middle name. BWAHAHAHAHA

        • Jim

          Hey Jimmy, you keep complaining about not seeing the President’s vital records and that must mean Hawaii was hiding something. Did you realize that if the President was born in Arizona, they would not show you either? So tell me, What’s Arizona hiding? How do we know Arizona’s not lying?

          “Arizona is a “closed record” state. That means that vital records are not public record. Arizona law restricts the public’s access to vital records…”


  • Jimmy

    The reason for the document is to see what info is on it. I get it. It doesn’t matter when or how it all came together or even who put it together.

    • Squeeky Fromm, Girl Reporter


      Right! If it was the paper document that had been pasted together, or altered, then a person would be right to be concerned why it had been done that way. But even in that case, to be a criminal forgery, there would have to be some false or materially altered information on it, AND done with an intent to deceive somebody about something. Unless there was some kind of specific law about altering that particular document.

      With electronic images, there might be several reasons why a document was “altered”, that would not constitute forgery. Suppose the contrast or brightness levels were adjusted to make it easier to read light typing or printing on the original. That would be an alteration, or enhancement, but it isn’t material, and isn’t criminal, nor even forgery.

      All Zullo has is, that he can’t duplicate the exact scanning and uploading method used to put the document on the net. I don’t pay a lot of attention to all the pixel and raster and technical stuff, but supposedly the culprit has been discovered, and it is a Xerox workstation which crops the image and does other things. That is not forgery.

      But to me, while interesting, that kind of stuff is just kind of overkill. It is the information on the document which is important, and which would form the basis of any criminal forgery, and if none of that is false, or materially altered, or materially misleading, there is no forgery.

      This is why I tease Zullo so much. He is claiming forgery, when he can’t show anything is false, altered, or misleading. He is just jerking the Birthers off. It’s kind of sad.

      Squeeky Fromm
      Girl Reporter

      • Reality Check

        Do you notice how that chicken Mark Gillar has gone into hiding since the Xerox information came out? He made a snarky video about how the white border and the clipping mask are absolute proof that the PDF is a forgery. Now we know that both. Now we know the Xerox has an Edge Erase feature that puts a white border around any scan by default and Preview inserts the clipping mask.

        • Jimmy

          If someone uses material from different sources to put together a document, then why would using a different font be an issue. Who has actually compared the scan to the original.?
          What do you think is the end game for Zullo?

        • Jim

          Jimmy: “What do you think is the end game for Zullo?”

          Zullo will publish another book where he will make claims that the Hayes report says certain things which are not really in the report. And the report will never see the light of day. Another money grab by Zullo. So Jimmy, will you buy the book or will you realize that Zullo has been scamming you for his own personal enrichment?

      • Jimmy

        I believe that if the public knew the scan was pieced together, (which you admit is a possibility) than the ”verifiers” would lose credibility. Of course the public has no idea that the people on this blog are much higher experts than Mr. Reed.

        • Jim

          Nothing changes the fact that Hawaii, the keeper of the records, say the President was born there. And the fact is, nobody has proven it was pieced together…and the American people have known about all the crazy conspiracy theories that you birthers have tried to come up with and thought so little of them they re-elected the President.

        • Jim

          Jimmy: “Of course the public has no idea that the people on this blog are much higher experts than Mr. Reed.”

          See Jimmy, you again show your total ignorance to how things work and what is and is not important. It’s not the image the WH posted on the web that proves the President’s eligibility, it’s the records in Hawaii. So, anyone claiming forgery, the President’s lying, etc, etc, etc means absolutely nothing. It’s the records in Hawaii that must be proven to be inaccurate. That has never been done, either by Orly or by the CCP. Till you can do that, the President is eligible and will serve out his term…have schools named after him, maybe an aircraft carrier, open a Presidential library…and birthers will still be trying to prove that an image on the web is a forgery even though it means absolutely nothing.

      • Jimmy

        A digital image that is ‘not a scan of an original paper birth certificate’ is something other than what it is presented to be.
        Just show what ever Abercrombie found. Or whatever they would not let him see. He covered his butt pretty good on that one, remember?
        Oh yes, he found a birth certificate by affidavit available in 1961 in accordance with the Heath Statistics Act of 1955 for the Territory of Hawaii.

        • Jim

          Jimmy: “A digital image that is ‘not a scan of an original paper birth certificate’ is something other than what it is presented to be.”

          Except for some important facts. 1) Original document that was used for the scan has multiple witnesses, who the idiot Zullo did not interview so you cannot say they didn’t see it. 2) Zullo’s claim of forgery has now been totally and completely debunked.

    • Jim

      Very good Jimmy. So when Arpaio and Zullo say that the document is 100% forgery, are they not lying to you?

      • Jimmy

        At the risk of further incurring your wrath, Sir Jim, if the scan was pieced together materials from different sources, how would Reed know what info matches the original?
        You can skip the ”BWAHA” part.

        • Jim

          By the verifications by the State of Hawaii. Plus, we now know it was not pieced together but was just a scan using a Xerox Workstation.

      • Jimmy

        Jim: ”Nothing changes the fact that Hawaii, the keeper of the records, say the President was born there”

        How would anyone ever know if they were telling the truth?
        These records are there solely for the viewing eyes of whoever happens to be in office? .

        • Jim

          Jimmy: “How would anyone ever know if they were telling the truth?”

          By proving they’re lying…Jesus, don’t you have an original thought in your head? You know how I know when you’re lying, you’re typing. You’ve proven it many times.

        • Joel L Lawler

          More to the point, Jimmy, why would anyone assume that they were NOT telling the truth? Other than being a conspiracy theorist or a racist?

        • Jim

          Jimmy: “How would anyone ever know if they were telling the truth?”

          Oh yes Jimmy! You’ve figured it out! I can see it now…you, in a courtroom, ready to strike:

          President’s Attorney: “Dr Fukino, you stated in October of 2008 that you had personally seen the Presidents records, is that correct?”

          Dr Fukino: “Yes”

          Jimmy: “LIAR, LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE!!!”

          Judge: “Case proven, remove the President from office.”

          Makes sense to you, doesn’t it Jimmy? BWAHAHAHAHA!!!

  • ramboike

    Hi Jimmy,

    These Obots are blowing smoke at you.

    Remember the claim was that the “electronic image” was a copy of the birth record on file at the HDoH. How do we know that “image” was a copy of what is claimed to be on file? Has that record on file been provided to verify it?

    Squeeky says, “….the information on the document which is important, …………………., if none of that is false, or materially altered, or materially misleading, there is no forgery.”

    What tangible evidence has been provided that would prove that “none” of the information on the “image” is false, materially altered, or misleading?

    Reality Check says Obama’s 2 COLBs, the certified copies that we’ve all seen pictures of, are court room ready & they are verifiable.

    Will RC show us how many times in the over 200 law suits this “court room ready evidence” has been submitted to the courts by Obama’s lawyers? What tangible proof can RC provide to back up the claim the copies are verifiable?

    Jim claims to have a witness but won’t provide it. I wonder why?

    • Jim

      Hey Rambo, back for another showing of your stupidity I see.

      Rambo: “How do we know that “image” was a copy of what is claimed to be on file?”

      A: Hawaii verified the information matched what is in their records 3 times, once to the SOS of Arizona, once to the SOS of Kansas, once for the case in Mississippi. What information has Zullo shown to be inaccurate…none.

      Rambo: “Jim claims to have a witness but won’t provide it. I wonder why?”

      A: Not true, I’ll be happy to give you the name of the witness, right after Zullo sits down and gets hooked up to a polygraph. Now, you’re the one who said the witness must be hooked up to a polygraph for you to believe their truthfulness, should be only fair that the accuser follow the same requirements. Unless, of course, you’re saying that Zullo has something to hide…like the multiple times he’s been caught lying.

      • ramboike

        Jim, you’re making all Obots look ignorant & deceitful with your response.

        If Lawler tells you 3 times him & Patty Da Perv have all kinds of awards as a gay-porn star couple, should you take him at his word or do you want to see the awards as tangible proof?

        You made the “witness claim” 1st. Now you’re trying to run & hide behind Zullo. You’re not the first Obot to try that on me. Dr. Con’s useful idiot flock tried that twice last year and both times went into excuse making when I called them on it. They never did produce, just like you won’t.

        • Jim

          So, you’re saying Zullo has something to hide with all the lying he has been caught in Rambo? Because that’s the exact same argument that you’ve used many time on the President. I didn’t bring up the polygraph, you did. You’re the person who is requiring extra-ordinary proof, not me. And now, you’re the one hiding behind Zullo, not me. You’re the one who’s showing you have no confidence in Zullo’s evidence, not me. You’re the accuser, not me…prove your accusations are accurate and truthful.

        • ramboike

          Run Forrest Run. This has become old hat. I ask Obots a question, they feel I’m trying to hold their butts to the fire, then become defensive.

          Re: So, you’re saying Zullo has something to hide…

          Knock knock, Forrest. Is there anybody home? I’m saying your butt felt the heat of having to produce a witness so you brought in Zullo for coverage. Actually your dumb ass would never catch on so I’ll explain it to you: If you had a witness they would be required to make a signed statement [deposition] & take polygraph(s). It would be considered verified proof for your Dear Leader’s birth story if they passed the polygraph.

          Of course your Dear leader has something to hide. That’s why he refuses to release any of the original records the American people have ask for. come on Forrest, you should at least know that.

          I’m not in on what evidence Zullo has or doesn’t have. What I stated regarding Zullo was that after 20 month investigation law enforcement has found the “digital image” to be a 100% forgery.

        • Joel L. Lawler

          You lose again, Rambette. It’s funny to watch you. Thanks!

    • Jimmy

      Obots blowing smoke at, up, and all the way around.
      That’s what you do when you have a question without an answer. Blow smoke up it and call it a racist.
      Became POTUS at age 47 and not one living human on earth to say they changed his diaper. He had a father that never had any desire to be US citizen, now theres a first.

      • Jim

        Just because things are first, doesn’t mean anything is wrong. BTW, his grandmother was alive when he was elected so another falsehood statement by Jimmy. You complain about questions, and yet you continually make false statements…thereby PROVING you don’t care whether the President is eligible or not. Proof you’re another birther! BWAHAHAAHAHA

      • Joel L Lawler

        Who cares if the President’s father did or did not want to be a US citizen? No one but you, Jimmy. And that’s sad.

  • Jim

    Rambo: “That’s why he refuses to release any of the original records the American people have ask for. come on Forrest, you should at least know that.”

    A couple of problems with that statement. One, they aren’t the President’s records, they are the State of Hawaii’s and are covered by Hawaii laws. Second, the American people haven’t asked for them, only a few malcontents who don’t want the President. Not even enough to worry about.

    Rambo: “I’m not in on what evidence Zullo has or doesn’t have. What I stated regarding Zullo was that after 20 month investigation law enforcement has found the “digital image” to be a 100% forgery.”

    Did Zullo lie to you, or is he that incapable of an investigator? All the reasons he gave for him thinking it was a forgery have now been proven false and have been duplicated. And, what kind of police investigation does not even interview witnesses? Again, I ask you, what proof do you have that the President has lied about his past or that the State of Hawaii has broken any law? None…just a few malcontents who don’t like the President.

    • Jimmy

      Jim: ”they aren’t the President’s records, they are the State of Hawaii’s and are covered by Hawaii laws.”

      Are you saying no one born in Hawaii can get a copy of their original unaltered BC?

      • Jim

        Let me ask you a few questions Jimmy, Zullo has now been caught lying multiple times about the evidence he has against the President and the State of Hawaii, do you think he’s dishonest about his so-called investigation or do you still believe him?

        How many law enforcement investigations have you heard of where the investigators do not interview eyewitnesses?

        We now know that the LFBC shown on WH.gov is not a man-made construct but a scan…should anyone trust Zullo’s word when he made the bold statement that the LFBC is a 100% forgery?

      • Joel L Lawler

        That’s true in NY, CT, and MA as well, to my experience. In many cases, the paper records have been digitalized, and what is available is either a long or short form certification of those records, attested by the lawful issuing authority.
        It’s easy if your mind is not clouded by hate.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: