Tag Archives: absurd

The Political Theatre of the Absurd!!! (Or, Deconstructing Klayman)

The Birthers Were Rational In Name Only

Well, we can’t say we weren’t warned. Bob Unruh over at World Net Daily has an exclusive story about the latest antics of Larry Klayman, Esq.  Here are a few excerpts, and there is a link that follows with the full story, and images of various documents:


A former U.S. Justice Department attorney who founded the government watchdog Judicial Watch and later Freedom Watch has warned a key Barack Obama attorney that Democrat Party or state elections officials certifying Obama’s eligibility for the 2012 election could become the targets of election-fraud charges.

In his letter to Robert Bauer, general counsel to the Democratic National Committee, Klayman explained that the evidence shows no one knows for sure about Obama’s eligibility, so letters from the DNC to states about Obama’s 2012 candidacy may be problematic.

“There is therefore no longer any state or national official in the Democratic Party who can escape legal responsibility for ignoring the proof herein provided, and a plea of ignorance of the facts will no longer be possible, especially under the informed legal counsel provided by you (and your state counterparts), Mr. Bauer,” Klayman wrote.

“At the same time that you are receiving this legal analysis, each DNC Executive Committee member – as well as each state Democratic Party chair, secretary of state, and state attorney general – is receiving a certified letter advising them of the legal jeopardy in which they place themselves should they proceed – in light of the facts herein presented – to certify to state or national election officials that Barack Hussein Obama is the constitutionally and legally qualified Democratic candidate for president of the United States.”

Such verifications, if created, would be “perjurious,” Klayman said.

Here is the link, and the full story has much more details and is worth the read, if only for the full dramatic impact:


Damn, all that sounds scary. Is he serious??? Is Klayman really threatening this sort of  nonsense?  Has he begun using  bill collector tactics??? You know, trying to scare the crap of of some poor wretched deadbeat with the ominous statement “I know somebody at the Prosecutor’s office, and if I don’t get a payment. . .”  But, these officials aren’t sitting there, hunkering down in a 12′ by 56′ mobile home, with a big hole in the bathroom floor, waiting for the Polizei to bust down the door.

These officials have a job, money, connections and paid for legal counsel. Klayman ought to know that. Has he lost his mind??? But wait, didn’t I say above that “we were warned”??? Remember back in May, 2012 when Larry “Big Gun” Klayman was hired by the Sam Sewell Syndicate  down in Florida??? Here is what Klayman said back on March 20, 2012:

Asked whether he has the goods on Obama, Klayman exclaimed, “Of course!  Others have already gathered what we need, with more in the pipeline. The task at hand is to compel court proof, official acknowledgment and removal from the ballot, as well as present the damning facts about Obama to the court of public opinion.”   Asked what he’ll do to help succeed, he stated: “accurate reading of applicable law, attention to rules of evidence, researching case law, venue selection and use of ‘political theater’ out of court.”  Case: Voeltz v. Obama, et. al.(Case No.: 2012CA00467) and is filed in Leon County Superior Court.


Now we know what is going on – – – Political Theater out of court. Klayman is playing for the Birther peanut gallery. No doubt they will begin salivating like a dog going through the McDonalds drive-thru, particularly if you have ever bought Mr. Fluffy a dollar double-cheeseburger there before. (Without the pickle.)

No real story here. Just spin. Klayman is chewing the scenery and trying to milk the absurd Birther crap for all it is worth. Enjoy the show for what it is.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Theatre of the Absurd. Wiki says:

The Theatre of the Absurd (French: Théâtre de l’Absurde) is a designation for particular plays of absurdist fiction written by a number of primarily European playwrights in the late 1950s, as well as one for the style of theatre which has evolved from their work. Their work expressed the belief that human existence has no meaning or purpose and therefore all communication breaks down. Logical construction and argument gives way to irrational and illogical speech and to its ultimate conclusion, silence.

Critic Martin Esslin coined the term in his 1960 essay “Theatre of the Absurd.” He related these plays based on a broad theme of the Absurd, similar to the way Albert Camus uses the term in his 1942 essay, “The Myth of Sisyphus”. The Absurd in these plays takes the form of man’s reaction to a world apparently without meaning, and/or man as a puppet controlled or menaced by invisible outside forces. Though the term is applied to a wide range of plays, some characteristics coincide in many of the plays: broad comedy, often similar to Vaudeville, mixed with horrific or tragic images; characters caught in hopeless situations forced to do repetitive or meaningless actions; dialogue full of clichés, wordplay, and nonsense; plots that are cyclical or absurdly expansive; either a parody or dismissal of realism and the concept of the “well-made play”.

Note 2. The Image.  The photograph is of Salvador Dali, and was taken by Phillipe Halsman. More about this can be found here:


Note 3. The Motif. (No really, the MOTIF, not the MOTIVE!) Eugene Ionesco wrote an Absurdist Play, called The Rhinoceros. Wiki says:

Rhinoceros (French original title Rhinocéros) is a play by Eugène Ionesco, written in 1959. The play belongs to the school of drama known as the Theatre of the Absurd. Over the course of three acts, the inhabitants of a small, provincial French town turn into rhinoceroses; ultimately the only human who does not succumb to this mass metamorphosis is the central character, Bérenger, a flustered everyman figure who is often criticized throughout the play for his drinking and tardiness. The play is often read as a response and criticism to the sudden upsurge of Communism, Fascism and Nazism during the events preceding World War II, and explores the themes of conformity, culture, mass movements, philosophy and morality.


Sooo, this fits in with the Theatre of The Absurd motif. But it also fits in with a wordplay on RINO, or Republicans In Name Only, a derogatory term tossed at moderate Republicans by their more right wing  brethren. Only now, RINO becomes Rational In Name Only. More interesting snippets  from the play can be found here:


Note 4. Here is a link to the original Internet Article here about Klayman and Florida:


The Rictal Scale of Birther Lawsuits

Poor Rocky, The Gargoyle, Had The Misfortune To Live On The World Net Daily Building

Apparently, the Deluge of Birther lawsuits will continue for quote a while. I suspect appeal after appeal will be filed as these stinkers get drop kicked out of the courthouses. Some of these will be pro se lawsuits filed by individual Birthers untrained in the law. Others will be filed by attorneys. Their level of absurdity will vary greatly. There needs to be some way to rate these lawsuits, much like the Richter Scale and Fujita scale are used to rate earthquakes and tornadoes.

But there is a problem. Part of rating earthquakes and tornadoes relates to the amount of damage done, and Birther lawsuits don’t do any damage outside of wasting the Court’s time. Paraphrasing Shakespeare, these are lawsuits filed by idiots,  full of sound and fury and signifying nothing.  However, if we can’t rate Birther lawsuits by the output, maybe we can rate them by the input!

To that end, I propose The Rictal Scale!!! Rictal is the adjective form of Rictus which is defined as:

ric·tus [ˈrɪktəs]
n. pl. rictus or ric·tus·es
1. The expanse of an open mouth, a bird’s beak, or similar structure.
2. A gaping grimace: “his mouth gaping in a kind of rictus of startled alarm” (Richard Adams).
3. a fixed or unnatural grin or grimace, as in horror or death.

rictal adj.

In other words, the more we groan at the lawsuit, and make faces, the higher on the scale it is. All we have to do is identify the elements which make us groan and assign them a numerical value.  Here are  my thoughts.  A Birther Lawsuit gets a point for each of these elements of absurdity:

1 Point for citing Minor v. Happersett as a precedent.

1 Point for stating there is a legal requirement for two citizen parents.

1 Point for simultaneously raising fraudulent birth certificate issues.

1 Point for citing the Dred Scott decision in support.

1 Chutzpah points for introducing Obama’s birth certificate as evidence  Obama’s father was a non-citizen while also claiming the birth certificate is fraudulent and false.

1 Point for claiming there is a difference between a 14th Amendment Citizen born in the United States and an Article 2 Section 1 Clause 5 natural born citizen.

1 Point for more than 10 spelling errors in the Complaint.

1 Point for suing the wrong party, with 1 Point for each additional mistake in service.

1 Point for mentioning Emerich de Vattel.

1 Point if the Complaint states The Law of Nations book is included in the U.S. Constitution.

1 Point for filing on a  pro se basis.

1 Point for filing in forma pauperis.

1 Point for requesting no empty chairs be allowed in the courtroom.

1 Point for filing after inauguration should Obama win in November 2012.

1 Point if the Plaintiff describes himself as a “patriot.”

1 Point if the Complaint mentions Leo Donofrio or Mario Apuzzo.

1 Point for each time a judge is asked to recuse himself.

1 Point if the Plaintiff accuses Obama of being a British citizen.

1 Points if the attorney is Orly Taitz.

1 Point if the Plaintiff prepares and files his own Amicus Curiae brief.

1 Point if the Plaintiff fails to mention Wong Kim Ark in the Complaint, or any Brief.

1 Point for each Amended Complaint.

1 Point for each Motion for Reconsideration.

1 Point for missing the Appeals deadline.

1 Point if any of the following words or terms are found in the Complaint or any Briefs: Usurper, frog march, Kenya, Muslim, Admiralty Court, New World Order, or gold fringe.

1 Point if the Plaintiff types his name in all lower case letters.

1 Point if the Plaintiff files as John Doe, or Anonymous.

1 Point for each and every other Absurd claim found in the Complaint or any Briefs as long as such absurdity is clearly listed.

Now this list could go on and on, but the beauty of the Rictal Scale, is that there is no upper limit like is found in the Fujita Tornado Scale or even in the Richter Earthquake Scale where as a practical matter, 9.5 seems to be tops. This is a good thing, for who could ever hope to predict the upper limits of Birther Absurdity.

Please consider the Rictal Scale, as a work in progress, and any and all contributions to further refining this tool will be appreciated.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1:  Thanks to G, at Obama Conspiracy Theories, for suggsting a point be added for Birther Plaintiffs citing the Dred Scott Decision!!!

Note 2: After initial publication of this Internet Article, the scale was renamed The Rictal Scale, the adjective form of the noun rictus being deemed more grammatically correct as descriptive of the noun scale. Like I said, this is a work in progress.

Happy Dodo Day???

Much Like The Dodo, The Two Citizen-Parent Theory Has Trouble Getting Off The Ground

It is Thanksgiving, and while most rational people are celebrating with a Turkey, I wonder if the two citizen-parent Birthers are celebrating with the equivalent of a Dodo.  The Dodo was a bird which went extinct in 1681, and about which Wiki says:

The dodo (Raphus cucullatus) was a flightless bird endemic to the Indian Ocean island of Mauritius. Related to pigeons and doves, it stood about a meter (3.3 feet) tall, weighing about 20 kilograms (44 lb), living on fruit, and nesting on the ground.The dodo’s significance as one of the best-known extinct animals and its singular appearance has led to its use in literature and popular culture to symbolize a concept or object that will or has become out of date, as in the expression “dead as a dodo” or “gone the way of the dodo”.In the same year in which George Clarke started to publish his reports, the newly vindicated bird was featured as a character in Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. With the popularity of the book, the dodo became a well-known and easily recognizable icon of extinction. according to the Encarta Dictionary and Chambers Dictionary of Etymology, “dodo” derives from Portuguese doudo (currently doido) meaning “fool” or “crazy”.

Well, the two citizen-parent Vattel Birthers definitely have extinction in common with the Dodo.  In fact, considering that the seminal English case, Calvin’s Case, was decided in 1608, the tw0 citizen-parent theory went extinct in English common law at least 73 years before the Dodo.

There is also an Alice in Wonderland aspect to the Vattel Birthers.  The Dodo is a caricature of the author, Lewis Carroll (Charles Lutwidge Dodgson).  Alice and several other characters go for a swim. In order to get dry, the Dodo proposes that everyone run a Caucus race — where the participants run in patterns of any shape, starting and leaving off whenever they like, so that everyone wins.

The two citizen-parent Birthers also have a Big Circus Tent where insane theories of all kinds co-exist, clash, and contradict in a willy-nilly fashion. Some push the British-citizen version, some that French law applies in America, some the phony Minor v. Happersett precedent, some the Indonesian adoptee theory, and others the Sovereign Citizen arguments that the 14th Amendment constitutes some sort of special citizenship completely divorced from natural born citizenship.

There is also a lack of consistency  regarding the sources of their special wisdom. Some find enlightenment in obscure out-of-context definitions found legal dictionaries, others in the writings of Emerich de Vattel, and still others in the speeches of various congressman during the debate over the 14th Amendment. One even thinks Shakespeare’s play, Henry V, is relevant.  These lists of schisms and sources are far from exhaustive.  All in all it is a merry troop where everybody’s pet theory wins. The only rule is to avoid any contact with logic and legal history.

There is another similarity to the Dodo. When Alice becomes stuck in the White Rabbit’s house, the Dodo proposes burning down the house to get her out.  In their own way, the two citizen-parent Birthers are willing to destroy the Constitution and American law to remove Obama from the White House, all while proclaiming to be patriots and Constitutionalists. Natural born citizenship? They re-write it in accordance with French law. Supreme Court decisions? Lie about them and ignore them. Elections? To hell with them.

All of which bring us to the final connection, the absurd and surreal nature of the debate. Here is an excerpt from this Internet Article: (Only the first paragraph is in German, then it switches to English.)


where we find:

When Dada meets Dodo– Caught in the Nothingness of Nonsense Literature and Dada

“There is a literature […] in which laws wither away.”

(From “Dada Manifesto” by Tristan Tzara)

This quotation can easily be applied to not only to the works of Dada but to Nonsense literature in general and here specifically to Lewis Carroll’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. Just as Dada wouldn’t surrender to any of the common principles of art, Carroll would withdraw his work from the common standards of interpretation by letting Wonderland redefine meaning and saying, blurring the border between logic and insanity, identity and names; reducing everything to the sheer nothingness of word. Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland represent a nonsensical even Dadaistic attempt to call in question the conceptual foundations of the reader’s world.

Together with Alice the reader abandons all conventions of language and enters a world in which coherence is of a different importance, a world in which conversation is hardly ever serving a purpose other than distortion and confusion. Nonsense and Dada celebrate contradictory poetics on the levels of form and content. In his Dada Manifesto Tristan Tzara wrote, “No more manifestoes,” declaring, “to be against this manifesto is to be Dadaist… in principle I am against manifestoes, as I am also against principle” The more astonishing it is that the reader comes to acknowledge that in Wonderland everybody but him and Alice seem to survive the raging arbitrariness of linguistic coherence.

Dada was the visible incarnation of the Dodo’s freedom – playing games without rules on race-courses without shape, winning without winning. Wonderland – the place where laws wither away. Dada is Dodo and Dodo is Nonsense.

This is a great Internet Article, and I recommend it just for the information it provides. But in connection with the two citizen-parent Birthers, this just nails them. In their world, the 1875 voting rights case Minor v. Happersett is elevated to precedent for natural born citizenship, and The Liberty Legal Foundation files eligibility suits over it. Irate Birthers, including state legislators, become incensed when the New Hampshire Elections Board ignores it. All this over a case where the Court comes right out and says about the citizenship of children born here of foreigners,  “For the purposes of this case it is not necessary to solve these doubts.

When the online legal research firm Justia, makes a programming error which affected that case and others, the Justiagate Conspiracy Theory is born.  They claim the 2008 election would have turned out differently if only people had known about  this case. Ignore the scads of other sources, free and otherwise. Ignore law books. Ignore the millions of lawyers on the other side of Obama. Heck, while you are at it, just ignore the language of the case to boot.

And when you debate the Vattel Birthers, be prepared for Dodo Reasoning.  You will be showered with out-of-context quote mining, sophistic syntax quibbling, and outright lying. There are several Internet Articles here which deal with this phenomenon and provide examples. And, all of this in light of very clear case law which holds that people born in the United States, whose parents are neither diplomats nor invading soldiers, are natural born citizens.

Sooo, yes. The Dodo is the bird for them. Perhaps next Thanksgiving, we can serve them crow.

For the rest of us, Happy Turkey Day!!!

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1: The Dodo Image.  The Artist is Zack Bellissimo, and he has some reallyKEWL art!!!.  His blog is here: