Tag Archives: Amicus Curia

Leo Donofrio, The Naked Emperor of the Birthers

Donofrio Couldn't Wait To Show Off His Custom Made Sartoria de Pazzo' Threads

Everybody is familiar with the story of The Emperor’s New Clothes, originally written by Hans Christian Andersen.  Wiki says:

A vain Emperor who cares for nothing but his appearance and attire hires two tailors who are really swindlers that promise him the finest, best suit of clothes from a fabric invisible to anyone who is unfit for his position or “just hopelessly stupid”. The Emperor cannot see the cloth himself, but pretends that he can for fear of appearing unfit for his position; his ministers do the same. When the swindlers report that the suit is finished, they mime dressing him and the Emperor then marches in procession before his subjects, who play along with the pretense.

Suddenly, a child in the crowd, too young to understand the desirability of keeping up the pretense, blurts out that the Emperor is wearing nothing at all and the cry is taken up by others. The Emperor cringes, suspecting the assertion is true, but holds himself up proudly and continues the procession, deciding never to be so vain again and to take his position more seriously.

There are many similarities to Leo Donofrio’s position in the Birther community. Some might protest that he comes closer to being one of the swindling tailors than the pompous emperor. But the tailors weren’t the ones prissing down the street in their Birthday Suit, like the Emperor and Donofrio. And, the adoring crowd probably would have had no problem jeering and pointing out that the tailors were nekkid. Except perhaps in San Francisco where such things are supposedly rather commonplace.

No, I think Donofrio is in the same fix as the Emperor. He has gone out there in front of the crowd, naked as a jay bird, and figures the best approach now is to try to bluff it out.  Just like a poker player with the 2,3,4, and 5 of hearts and the 7 of clubs.  Damn that ace or 6 of hearts for not being there!!!  Like the Emperor above, Donofrio also knows that he is holding a hand full of crap, but he is just in too deep to fold.

Donofrio’s fancy threads, the ones that only the stupid and incompetent can’t appreciate; the threads that are supposed to separate the elite from those unfit for his position or “just hopelessly stupid; and the threads that will plop Donofrio I down into the history books as a Great Emperor,  are his recent 209 page Amicus Curiae Brief, tendered to the Georgia Court.  Here is a link to the Brief:

http://www.scribd.com/doc/79112841/AMICUS-BRIEF-by-Leo-Donofrio-in-Georgia-Presidential-Eligibility-Case

Sooo, we get the 200 page Amicus Curiae brief, full of unintelligible drivel.  The legal equivalent of psycho-babble. Do you know why it is 200 pages??? So that you WILL NOT read it.  You are supposed to be impressed by the weight of the paper alone.  Plus, 3/4 of it consists of photocopies of old books and old law cases. There is only about 50 pages of actual Donofrio Drivel.

Donofrio’s forte is pain and his opus is the equivalent of the old peine forte et dure where the recalcitrant were pressed to plead, or die. By page 17, most of the frail will convert to Birtherism rather read anymore of this crap.  It  has been reported, but not yet confirmed,  that several readers gagged to death as early as page 6, after reading this:

Natural Allegiance – Via Jus Soli – Was A Uniquely Christian Point Of Law
Repugnant To The First Amendment Of The United States Constitution.

The common law rule of jus soli subjection is a complex spiritual concept, which does not simply relate to birth on British soil. Despite popular belief, the common law meaning of “natural-born” is not synonymous with “native-born”. The true nomenclature of “natural-born subject” is rooted in “natural subjection” to the spiritual body of Christ, and therefore our Constitution forbids any construction of the “natural-born citizen”clause that alleges the term to be synonymous with “natural-born subject”.

OK,  that was bad. A religious and First Amendment objection to the current legal interpretations of natural born citizenship???  Funny, but I don’t recall the judges in the Wong Kim Ark case citing the Bible. Nor the judge in Lynch v. Clarke. Or the judges in Ankeny, or in Georgia, or Illinois, or Virginia. This is how we know Donofrio perceives his own nudity.  He is a lawyer, and he has crafted a theory that only the legally ignorant could swallow.

He just wants the Birthers to play along and pretend that he is wearing clothes. Maybe those people who died after reading that, might have made it, except that their system had already been immuno-compromised even earlier back on page 2, where Leo I, Emperor Magnus, Protector Of Parakeets, and The Defender of Ultima Thule solemnly pronounces:

A. According To Precedents of Statutory Construction, The 14th Amendment Has
Not Repealed Or Modified The Natural Born Citizen Clause.

One wants to Cry DUH!!!, and let slip the dogs of the Insane Asylum to track Donofrio down, and tree him until the men with the butterfly nets arrive.  Perhaps while they are waiting,  Donofrio and the dogs can all howl at the moon together, for entertainment. Didn’t the judges in Wong Kim Ark state that the 14th Amendment actually  AFFIRMED the law of natural born citizenship and enshrined it in the U.S. Constitution. Well, unless I miss my guess, the Birthers will pretend those words aren’t there.

Of course we also get the good old Leo Donofrio Minor v. Happersett argument where the words “For the purposes of this case it is not necessary to solve these doubts” (about whether or not children born in the United States to aliens were citizens) transmogrify through the Arcane Art of Grammatical Misconstruction into the polar opposite and magically solve the doubts.  There about 52 pages of exposition on these 3 main themes, and then a ton of exhibits to finish off.  Much of it consists of photocopies of old books. Some is in Latin, like this, on page 67 of 209:

Rex universis et singulis admirall’, castellan’, custodibus 7 Coke ;/Report 9 a, 77 ER p387 castrorum,

I don’t speak Latin, but I think it means somebody named Rex plans to jail either Walter Fitzpatrick or CDR Kerchner in Spain, ply them with cocaine, and then castrate them at 9:00 AM in the Emergency Room.  If I am totally wrong in my translation, then I  still bet I am no worse than Donofrio trying to translate from English.

And sooo, this is how Leo Donofrio, Naked Emperor of the Birthers, struts his stuff. Unfortunately for him, his Brief is made of the same stuff as the Emperor’s New Clothes – – – Imaginary Threads. And thus his Briefs are showing, and he is exposed.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Emperor’s New Clothes by Hans Christian Andersen. Wiki has more to say, incuding this interesting side note:

Andersen dread the tale in a German translation titled “So ist der Lauf der Welt”. In the source tale, a king is hoodwinked by weavers who claim to make a suit of clothes invisible to any man not the son of his presumed father. Andersen avoided anything risqué in his work and altered the source tale to direct the focus on courtly pride and intellectual vanity rather than adulterous paternity.

Andersen’s manuscript was at the printer’s when he was suddenly inspired to change the original climax of the tale from the emperor’s subjects admiring his invisible clothes to that of the child’s cry. Andersen’s decision to change the ending may have had its source in a childhood incident similar to that in the tale. In 1872, he recalled standing in a crowd with his mother waiting to see King Frederick VI. When the king made his appearance, Andersen cried out, “Oh, he’s nothing more than a human being!” His mother tried to silence him by crying, “Have you gone mad, child?”