Tag Archives: CDR Kerchner

PoopPac Downloads The Honey Wagon!!! (Or, Birthers Run Downhill)

CDR Kerchner Worked Tirelessly To Spread His Message

The Article II Superpac, aka PoopPac (People Opposing Obama’s Presidency PAC) made the news at ObamaReleaseYourRecords with an ad that ran in the Washington Times. The banner reads  BIGGER THAN WATERGATE.  Here is a link to the Internet Article:


And here is a copy of the ad:

The whole premise of the ad above relies upon the fact that Sheriff Arpaio and The Cold Case Posse’s found the long form birth certificate image to be a forgery.  Well, let’s play a little game and we’ll call it “What’s My Lie???” Let’s assume for a moment that the long form birth certificate is a forgery! Let’s try to discover what information on it would  actually be something Congress should be interested in.

In a previous Internet Article, I made a list of all the 43 pieces of information included on the long form. Here is again. Just refer to pages 3 and 4 for the list:

Obama Forgery Test

Now, let’s narrow this list down and see how many of these items, if false, would make Obama ineligible to be President.  Well, we get one whole item, which if false, would make Obama ineligible:

6a. Place of Birth (City) –  Honolulu

That’s it. If the time of Obama’s birth is false, he is still eligible. If his father isn’t Barack Obama Sr., he is still eligible. If the doctor wasn’t David Sinclair, he is still eligible. The same with every other item of information, except the place of birth. Everything else on the birth certificate could be false, forged, materially altered, erased, or created out of whole cloth, etc.,  BUT, if Obama was born in the state of Hawaii, then he is eligible.

I guess the purist might point out if Obama’s parents were both foreign diplomats, or invading soldiers, then Obama wouldn’t be eligible, but so far even the Birthers haven’t argued that. No, the only real item of potential forgery that would make Obama ineligible is his place of birth.

Sooo, has Sheriff Joe or Deputy Zullo, or any other member of the posse proven, or even alleged, that Obama wasn’t born in Hawaii???  Nope. Nada. None.  In fact, they have not been able to prove to any degree whatsoever that any single one of those 43 pieces of information contained in the long form image is false, forged, materially altered, erased, or created out of whole cloth, etc.

In fact, Arpaio and Zullo admit that there is NOTHING which criminally implicates Obama in their investigation. This is from a transcript of the July 12, 2012 press conference, at pages 26 and 27 :

Female reporter: Are you insinuating that the President in any way – are you saying that the President has anything to do with this?

Zullo: I am not. I am not, ma’am. I don’t know what Mr. Obama knows about this. I, I trulydon’t.

Arpaio: I said on March one, right from the beginning; we are not accusing the President of any crime. We are strictly investigating a possible government forged document, and that’s the way we’re still going with this, we’re talking about documents.

Reporter: If that, if that’s. I, I don’t get that sir, because if this is a crime, and it’s the President’s
birth certificate, how could he not be accused of a crime? How could you not be accusing himof a crime?

Arpaio: We’re not saying that he knew about it. Did we, did I ever say that he knew about it?

Reporter: So you’re telling me he doesn’t know about this birth certificate … [unintelligible]

Arpaio: I have no idea. [Zullo and Arpaio whispering unintelligibly]

Zullo: Yeah, let me … [unintelligible] I think that’s a great question.[Several reporter talking over each other and over Zullo – unintelligible]

Zullo: [Difficult to understand due to cross-talking] Let me explain this to you; let me explain this to you, sir. Sir. I think I said it March 1st [interruption] – hang on – hang on a minute. Sir, sir; what I said in March 1st. None of us could validate with any certainty where we were born. We weren’t cognoscente of the event. Ok? For all I know, Mr. Obama’s been told this his whole life.I don’t know. It might even be he was born in Hawaii.

What we are telling you is [points to the Long Form Birth Certificate while shaking his head], that document isn’t real. That’s the difference; that’s the distinction in law. We’re talking about a forged document being used, maybe mistakenly, by Mr. Obama. But somebody knows how it got there. The Department of Health didn’t create it; didn’t create the file [points to the Long Form Birth Certificate]. Somebody else did. That mere fact means the Department of Health,that would have the only legal authority to make a copy of a document like that or even render an abstract; the only legal authority to do it did not. That’s a falsified document.


I like hyperbole as much as the next girl, but really now, an investigation that can’t disprove any of the 43 items of information is sooo wonderful and important as to be BIGGER THAN WATERGATE???  An investigation where the investigators admit that Obama may have indeed been born in Hawaii is supposed to have any credibility at all???  

I think it is more accurate to say the results of the investigation is browner and stinkier than the stuff the farmer in the image above is spreading on the fields.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. Honey Wagon.

Wiki and Wiki Talk say:

Honey wagon” is a facetious traditional general term for “a wagon or truck for collecting and carrying excrement or manure”, such as a cesspool emptier, which serves as a sanitation system including at campgrounds and marinas.

manure spreader or muck spreader or honey wagon is an agricultural machine used to distribute manure over a field as a fertilizer. A typical (modern) manure spreader consists of a trailer towed behind a tractor with a rotating mechanism driven by the tractor’s power take off (PTO). Truck mounted manure spreaders are also common in North America.

Joseph Oppenheim, a schoolmaster in the small town, concerned that his older male students often missed school loading and spreading manure, patented a wagon that, behind the drag chain and two beaters, incorporated a steel axle with several wooden paddles attached to the shaft at an angle to throw the manure outward in a broad pattern eliminating the necessity for manual spreading. On October 18, 1899, Oppenheim began to produce his new manure spreader, incorporating the “widespread” paddle device. Neighbors soon referred to it as “Oppenheim’s new idea” and Oppenheim adopted this name for his business.

The origin of the term “honeywagon” goes way back to outhouses not just recent porta potties… thought I’d just mention that you might want to check more into why it is called this…what I was told by parents who remember Honeywagons from in the early 20th century: the name had nothing to do with the color of anything dripping from “tanks”…they said they were called that tongue-in-cheek and the Honeywagon people were “Honeydippers” since they literally had to dip the waste from the hole in the ground in the outhouse to clean/empty them when they were getting full. Like beekeepers, who sold honey kept in large pots or barrels, would do to remove the honey to put in containers for the customer using a large dipper, the other honeydippers “dipped” the “honey”/waste from the privvie (sp?) and put it in the barrels on the honeywagon (which was actually a real wagon pulled by horses) and, as they drove thru the streets of the town to do their jobs, the flies, of course, would be attracted by the “fragrance” of the “honey” and buzz the wagon like they would buzz around honey skeps and hives and trees containing honeycombs.

Rudy Tutor Ricochets – Hits Himself!!!

(Click on Image to make it larger.)

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CDR Kerchner has a new Internet Article up where we get to watch and listen to Rudy Davis , aka lonestar1776, tutor us on the meaning of natural born citizenship. Here is the link to Kerchner’s blog:


Some of you may recognize Rudy as World Net Daily’s Number 1 Fan, from a previous article here where Rudy volunteered to execute Obama, should he ever be arrested, tried, and found guilty of whatever.  Rudy may have just been over-excited by the news that day, what with Sheriff Joe Arpaio and the Cold Case Posse having reported that the online image of Obama’s long form birth certificate was a forgery. Oh, and the circular postal dating stamp was missing a few digits. Them’s purty serious crimes in these here United States!

Now, here is Rudy’s youtube lecture.

Rudy reads from a number of textbooks. His first mistake is to ASSUME that natural born citizen means two citizen parents because Article 2, Section 1 Clause 5 uses two different terms – natural born citizen and citizen at the time of the founding. Then, every time he encounters the words natural born citizen it’s “AHA!!! – See I told you so!!! It takes two citizen parents!!!

We get to go through several textbooks and then at the 6:00 minute mark, we get the first ricochet. The textbook says children born abroad of citizen parents might be natural born.  This distinction escapes our Rudy. Obama was born INSIDE the country.

At around the 8:00 – 8:30 minute mark Rudy plugs himself again, with another jus sanguinis example for children born abroad. Rudy goes on to say Obama isn’t natural born because his father was Kenyan. BUT Rudy, Obama was NOT born abroad.   Apparently, our boy has a high tolerance for pain, because around the 11:05 minute mark, Rudy pops another cap into himself, this one right in the old ticker.

This time, the textbook is in error because it says the President must be U.S. born, not natural born in the way Rudy thinks the term means. Yes. Rudy actually reads the words U.S. BORN and figures out the book  must be wrong, because it sure can’t be him. But he does try to cover this little bo-bo by telling us about how George Washington checked out Vattel’s Law of Nations, and it is now several hundred years overdue.

Call me soft-hearted, but I don’t get as mad at somebody like Rudy being flat out wrong, as I do at the Jerome Corsi, Joseph FarahMario Apuzzo, CDR Kerchner, and Leo Donofrio type Birthers. While those people have gone to college, and have the benefits of higher education, I suspect poor old Rudy has got his education behind the wheel of a tractor and loading bales of hay in the hot sun.  Heck, he is out buying civics and history textbooks at the thrift store to try to understand this stuff.

Curses to all the no-good lousy educated bastards who have lead him on and lied to him!!!

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Images are from the March 1952 issue of  Life Magazine, Rooty Toot Toot, a re-telling of the Frankie and Johnny story. The art is very retro and the whole story may be found here:


Luckily, youtube has the original animated short, from 1951:

The Herculean Labors (Or, Wrassling The Cretin Bull, And Cleaning Up Behind Him)

The Birthers Got Carried Away By The Cretin Bull

Well, the software is telling me that this is the 200th post at The Birther Think Tank. So perhaps is time to step back and reflect on the Big Picture nature of the Anti-Birther vs. Birther Struggle.  There are analogies to be found in two of the mythological Labors of Hercules, specifically the 5th and 7th Labors.

The Fifth Labor of Hercules was to clean the Augean Stables. Thousands of cows lived in these stables belonging to King Augeus. They had not been cleaned in 30 years, but Hercules was told to clean them completely in a single day. To do so he made two rivers bend so that they flowed into the stables, sweeping out the filth. ( from Infoplease)

The Seventh Labor of Hercules was to capture the Cretan Bull. This savage bull, kept by King Minos of Crete, was said to be insane and breathe fire. Hercules wrestled the mad beast to the ground and brought it back to King Eurystheus. Unfortunately, the king set it free, and it roamed Greece, causing terror wherever it went. (from Infoplease)

There Was Money To Be Made From Manure

Those two myths pretty much cover the life of the Anti-Birther. Our battle is defined by the other side. The Birthers create the bullsh*t, and  we must clean it up. It is a never-ending task because the bull-sh*tters are constantly pumping out new product on a regular basis. Unike Hercules, we can not divert any rivers (due to the lack of a Corps of Engineers’ permit) to short cut the job. No, we must shovel it up the old fashioned way, one scoop at a time into the Wheelbarrel of Truth, and roll it out to the Compost Pile of Birther Dreams.

Making the job more difficult is the fact that some people make money off the bullsh*t. Television provides a most appropriate illustration of  this fact. The Image directly above is from the TV series, Hercules, The Legendary Journeys, the Reign of Terror episode. In that episode Salmoneus, the somewhat shady promoter character, travelled with Hercules to visit the Augean Stables. He concocted a plan to sell manure from the stables with Hercules’ celebrity endorsement. (“Reign of Terror“).

Here you should be thinking Jerome “Jerry” CorsiWorld Net Daily, Cold Case Posse Deputy Michael Zullo, and a host of other Birthers who profit, one way or another, from promoting the nonsense. It is my opinion that many Birthers are also in it for the attention, such as CDR Kerchner, Mario “The Mangler” Apuzzo, and the late “Leo Donofrio, Esq.” These people are not so stupid that they could seriously believe the two-citizen parents Imaginary Law. But, some people are.

Hercules Could Just Swear He Had Encountered This Bull Before

Daily, we Anti-Birthers wrassle with the insane Cretin Bull and no matter how many times we pin its shoulders to the ground, it just gets loose to cause more terror and distress. Old, discredited rumors persistently find resurrection in the Birther Blogosphere and resurface.  Most recently, Postman Allen Hulton has resurrected the Obama As A Foreign Student myth, based on 20+ year old hearsay conversations.  This Who Was He??? identity trope is also mirrored in the Hercules myth. There was uncertainty as to the identity of the Cretan Bull.

The Cretan bull, was said to be the father of the Minotaur by Pasiphae, wife of the Cretan king Minos. By one account, the Cretan bull was the beast that had carried Europa from Phoenicia to Crete for Zeus. In other myths, the bull was sent by Poseidon to Minos,to be sacrificed following the king’s promise that he would sacrifice to the god anything that rose from the sea. But Minos, struck by the animal’s beauty, sacrificed in its place another bull, thus provoking the god’s rage. The sea god then in revenge drove the animal wild, ravaging the crops and orchards of Crete.

Hercules captured the beast after a lengthy struggle. He brought it all the way back across the sea to Tiryns, to present it to Eurystheus. He then set the beast free. It then roamed around Laconia and Arcadia, crossed the Corinth Isthmus and ended up in Marathon, to be later captured and killed by Theseus.


In fact, the first image here is Europa Carried Away By The Cretan Bull by Noël-Nicolas Coypel, 1726-1727In a way, America has been carried away by the Birthers’ Cretin Bull.  A Cretan is, of course, someone from the island of Crete. A cretin, on the other hand is a person of subnormal intelligence. In the past that term, and others, were associated with specific I.Q. levels. There is some disagreement about the levels, but this seems representative:

Cretin…. IQ 70-85
Moron ….IQ 55-70
Imbecile..IQ 40-55
Idiot…….IQ under 40

What we must deal with daily are cretinous, moronic, imbecilic and idiotic arguments. Even Birther Mensa members like Sam Sewell of The Steady Drip blog sally forth into the two citizen parents argument despite repeated court losses on that point. Ex-military officers like CDR Kerchner and Walter “Citizen’s Arrest” Fitzpatrick spew forth Vattel like gargoyles on the Notre Dame Cathredal during a cloudburst. Jerome “Jerry” Corsi, who has a Ph.D from Harvard, carries on like a madman biting on every piece of worthless evidence like a Great White Shark chomping down on a surfboard – swallowing it now, and letting the other end worry about the consequences.

So why do we do it??? I can’t answer for other people. Personally, I don’t even think we are winning the battle.  Birther Blogs seem to be springing up everywhere, and the stupidity knows no shame. Or limits. The courts throw the Birther Junk out, but they would do that whether we were here or not. Obama is still on the ballot in every state, but I am not even an Obama supporter. I’ll probably vote for the Republican, or if he is too nutty, just stay home.  And it is not like any ex-Birthers have ever told me, ‘Thank you, Squeeky! You have convinced me I was wrong about this Birther stuff.” That has never happened.

I think that me, and probably the other Anti-Birthers and Obots, too, just can’t stand to let these idiotic lies go unchallenged. Like that other Hercules, the French one, Hercule-Savinien-De Cyrano de Bergerac said:

What say you? It is useless? Ay, I know
But who fights ever hoping for success?
I fought for lost cause, and for fruitless quest!
You there, who are you!–You are thousands!
I know you now, old enemies of mine!

(He strikes in air with his sword):

Have at you! Ha! and Compromise!
Prejudice, Treachery!. . .

(He strikes):

Surrender, I?
Parley? No, never! You too, Folly,–you?
I know that you will lay me low at last;
Let be! Yet I fall fighting, fighting still!

(He makes passes in the air, and stops, breathless):

You strip from me the laurel and the rose!
Take all! Despite you there is yet one thing
I hold against you all, and when, to-night,
I enter Christ’s fair courts, and, lowly bowed,
Sweep with doffed casque the heavens’ threshold blue,
One thing is left, that, void of stain or smutch,
I bear away despite you.

(He springs forward, his sword raised; it falls from his hand; he staggers,
falls back into the arms of Le Bret and Ragueneau.)

ROXANE (bending and kissing his forehead):
‘Tis?. . .

CYRANO (opening his eyes, recognizing her, and smiling):



Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter