Tag Archives: Virginia

The Second Book Of Judges (Update to The Birther Bible!!!)

The Birthers Were Too Busy Tooting Their Own Horns To Hear What The Judges Said

Oh, this is great news!!! More secret Birther information, and a new book to add to The Birther Bible, the rest of which may be found here:

https://birtherthinktank.wordpress.com/the-birther-bible/

The Second Book of Judges

Chapter 1

1. Trusting in the Prophet Vattel, verily did his Disciples begin to spread his word among all the peoples of the land, yea even unto the very Courts of the Law
2. Yet the Judges thereof were cold men of hard demeanor, who kneweth not of visions and strange divinations.
3.  First, the Judges of the Tribe of Indiana didst send the Birthers packing, saying they kneweth not whereof they spake, and that the Birthers understoodeth not the words of the  Judges of Minor v. Happersett.
4.  Then, in like manner a Judge of the Tribe of Georgia, didst send the Birthers packing, saying they kneweth not whereof they spake, and that the Birthers understoodeth not the words of the  Judges of Minor v. Happersett.
5. With great impudence, the Judge of The Tribe of Georgia, favored the words of an empty chair, though it spoke not, over the words of the Birthers.
6. Verily, in a third such smite, a Judge of the Tribe of Virginia didst send a Birther of that land packing, saying he kneweth not whereof he spake, and that the Birther understoodeth not the words of the Judges of Minor v. Happersett.
7. And, with much disdain, the Judge of the Tribe of Virginia didst also speak harsh words unto the Birther, mocking him for a Fool, saying his words were without worth,  and forbade him from coming again unto that Court.
8. Lo, but the travails mounted up unto the very Heavens,  for then a Judge of the Tribe of Illinois didst send a Birther of that land packing, saying he kneweth not whereof he spake, and that the Birther understoodeth not the words of the Judges of Minor v. Happersett.

Chapter 2

1. It taketh not a wise man to discerneth a pattern in these things, and portents of things yet to come.
2. For liketh unto a small ball of snow rolling down a mountain, it mayst but grow larger and larger until it buries all before it.
3. So likewise might the words of the Judges, over a time, be heard and reinforce one the other, until the voices of the Birthers are met everywhere with laughter and great  jeering.
4.  For then will the people sayeth unto us,  that we knoweth not whereof we speak, and we understandeth not the words of the Judges of Minor v. Happersett.
5. Perhaps it wouldst be a wise thing for us Birthers to haveth ready made excuses near at hand, to explaineth away these defeats, and the ones yet to cometh.
6. Therefore, let it be said, when we meet with defeat in the Courts of the Law, that the Judges thereof are but exchanging false decisions for gold and favors.
7. Or, let it be said, that the  Judges are but minions of the Usurper, and thus provide false decisions out of loyalty unto him.
8. Shouldst the Judge be of a group opposed to the Usurper, let it be said that he has been threatened for his life, or that unknown persons have graven images of him in compromising positions of adultery, which they doth dangle over his head.
9. Also might we blame our defeats on our Advocates, saying that they doth secretly labor on behalf of the Usurper, or are not truly wise in the ways of the Law, having learned their craft at long distances from the places of teaching.
10. Nor shouldst we stoppeth with these alone.
11. Let our explanations be called Legion, for from these signs and omens, great will be our needs.

Oh wow, this is really a scoop getting this information!!! I hope it helps everybody understand better where the Birthers are coming from.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter


Yes, Virginia, There Is NO Two Citizen-Parents Clause

No, Mario. I'm Only Asking About Santa Claus. Everybody Knows The Two Citizen-Parents Requirement Is Just A Childish Fantasy.

Now, in a short and sweet decision, a Federal court in the State of Virginia has pricked another Birther Balloon. One, Charles Tisdale, filed a complaint alleging:

Mr. Tisdale seeks an injunction enjoining the Virginia State Board of Elections from certifying any candidate who lacks standing as a “natural born citizen” from appearing on the ballot for the upcoming presidential general election on November 6, 2012.Specifically, Mr. Tisdale cites Barack Obama, Mitt Romney, and Ron Paul as ineligible to appear on the ballot, on the grounds that each had at least one parent who was not a citizen of the United States. The Court rules that the Complaint does not state a claim upon which relief may be granted.

The Federal Judge slapped the suit down holding:

The eligibility requirements to be President of the United States are such that the individual must be a “natural born citizen” of the United States and at least thirty-five years of age. U.S. Const. art. II, § 1. It is well settled that those born in the United States are considered natural born citizens. See, e.g., United States v. Ark, 169 U.S. 649, 702 (1898) (“Every person born in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, becomes at once a citizen of the United States.”); Perkis v. Elg, 99 F.2d 408, 409 (1938). Moreover, “those born ‘in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof,’ … have been considered American citizens under American law in effect since the time of the founding … and thus eligible for the presidency.” Hollander v. McCain, 566 F. Supp. 2d 63, 66 (D.N.H 2008). Thus, Mr. Tisdale’s contention that President Obama, Governor Romney, and Congressman Paul are not eligible to be President due to their nationalities is without merit.

And, the ruling was “with prejudice” which means the Plaintiff can’t come back with an Amended suit:

Accordingly, the Court dismisses the Complaint for failure to state a claim. This dismissal is with prejudice, as the Court finds that allowing leave to refile would yield the same result, given the underlying premise of Mr. Tisdale’s claim.

This is about the same thing as coming right out and calling the suit frivolous. Where, O Where is all that legal jargon that Mario Apuzzo, Esq. and Leo Donofrio, Esq. like to bandy about??? Court after court is simply chucking the imaginary two citizen-parents requirement in the garbage can where it belongs.  Here is where you can read the whole 3 page decision:

http://www.scribd.com/doc/80563782/Tisdale-v-Obama-et-al

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter