Tag Archives: Zullo

A Black Night For Team Arpaio???


He Must Have Gotten Some Strange Kicks From Denial???

Team Arpaio and the Cold Case Posse aren’t exactly having the best of times lately.  They can’t get a real, live prosecutor interested in their silly report that concludes Obama’s online image of his long form birth certificate is a forgery.  After a year and half, they can’t even release the report to the public for fear of ridicule.  On a good day, Republican congressmen merely ignore them. On most days, which are not good days, the congressmen cancel out meetings with them as soon as they find out what kind of idiot with whom they accidentally scheduled a meeting. Nightly, they pray for Alzheimers to strike Republican leaders so they will finally find someone to agree with them.

Human beings are proving a huge obstacle, and now, the mean old Obots, particularly the blogger, NBC,  have gone and made things worse by uncovering the source of the online birth certificate anomalies – – -A Xerox Workcentre machine which does all the strange and weird things that so discomfort the Birthers.  RC, of the RC Radio Blog, has many articles up on this issue, including a hilarious video:


There are several more articles at the link which explain in simple terms how the online anomalies occurred. It looks convincing to me! The Obots have not been silent about their discovery! After sneaking their way onto Gallups’ radio show, the cat is out of the bag in the Birther world. Finally, Carl Gallups and Mike Zullo had to address the issues about the Xerox 7655. Sooo, how did they handle it???


Deputy Mike “The Arizona Kid” Zullo recently appeared on Gallups radio show, and here is a transcript of their remarks, from the first part of the show:

Gallups: What’s your response to these Obots?

(3:54)  Mike Zullo: I think they’re delusional. I think they’re deluded that they are some vessel of authority somewhere. I don’t know in what stratosphere.  But I don’t owe them anything. I have never engaged them in two years. I don’t really pay a lot of attention to them. And what little I do know of them, aside from the identities of a few, and one that I am intently focused on now. It really just seems to me to be nothing more than a big disinformation campaign. It goes beyond even misinformation. It is disinformation. And for a definition, it’s false information that is deliberately, and a lot of times covertly spread, in order to influence public opinion, or to obscure the truth. And that to me, is about what it is, so to even deal with them as far as I’m concerned is brain damage. I don’t see any reason to do it.

(5:22) Carl Gallups: They are absolutely ever-loving out of their delusional minds. I mean they are absolutely mentally challenged.


They went on to discuss the Xerox Workcentre and characterized it as not relevant to the investigation, and stated that the investigation had moved well beyond that point. Which only casts more suspicions on the underlying Cold Case Posse report. If it is that great, why is it still secret after a year and a half? Why don’t any prosecutors seem interested in it? Why is it that Deputy Zullo has to go to Washington D.C. and beg the VIPs and congressman to do something about it? Why does he keep getting rejected?

If Deputy Zullo has any legitimate questions why this is happening, perhaps he needs to do something he has refused to do for two years- and engage with the Obots and anti-Birthers.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Image. This is from the 1975 film, Monty Python and the Holy Grail. This particular scene occurs when the King meets the Black Knight.  Here is a youtube video of this particular scene:

Grace Vuoto Falls For A Crock!!! (And Catches The Pixel Pox!!!)

Sometimes, What Happens In The Caiman Islands, Should Just Stay In The Caiman Islands

Well, another allegedly intelligent person done fell into Birther Madness trap. Her name is Grace Vuoto, and she is a big wig over at the Burke Institute For America. I found her silliness scanning through Poo Poo Simmons’ website. Here are a few excerpts, and the full article is at the link below:

There is a problem with President Barack Obama’s long-form birth certificate: It’s a forgery, say multiple forensic experts who have examined it. A report detailing the evidence will soon be presented to Congress.

Then she reiterates a bunch of Zullo Crap and concludes with:

What many in the media fail to grasp is that so-called “birthers” would rather be wrong than right. It is more upsetting for many of them to believe that this kind of crime can be committed than that it was not.

The difference between a conspiracy theory and a crime is that a conspiracy theory cannot stand against the test of forensic evidence. Those who dismiss this investigation as merely “kooky” must answer these questions: Are leading experts in their field who have provided their professional assessment to a criminal investigation merely to be ignored? Why would these experts risk their reputation and also commit perjury? It is therefore kookier to disregard these assessments summarily than to view them with an unbiased eye.

The evidence currently being accumulated by the Cold Case Posse requires consideration. It is time for Congress to do its constitutional duty and examine all this hard evidence in the clear light of day.


Here is the original document:


Ms. Vuoto does not appear to be an inherently stupid person. Here is her blurb from:


Dr. Grace Vuoto, Founder

Dr. Grace Vuoto

Dr. Grace Vuoto is the editor of politics and culture at WorldTribune.com and the host of American Heartland with Dr. Grace on WTSB Radio. She founded the Edmund Burke Institute, was the executive director from June, 2005 to June, 2013 and the editor of its flagship publication, Reflections. Dr. Vuoto is a professor, scholar, editor and columnist.She was the executive producer of the daily radio talk show, The Kuhner Show on WTNT 530 am in Washington D.C. (2010). She wrote a weekly column for The Washington Times, “On Base with Grace,” and was editor of Base News, a project of The Washington Times for the military community (2009). She was an editorial writer at The Washington Times (2008). She was Assistant Professor of Modern British and European History at Howard University in Washington, D.C. (2002-2006). She specializes in intellectual, diplomatic and imperial history. She taught at Virginia Commonwealth University (2001-2002) and McGill University (1996-2000). Dr. Vuoto has contributed articles and/or book reviews to Reflections, The Washington Times, Insight on the News, Human Events, The Ripon Forum, World and I and The Journal of Canadian History. Her articles have been featured on The Drudge Report, ABC News, Real Clear Politics, Real Clear World, USA Today, Yahoo, World Tribune, Freepressers and RightBias among countless other Web sites. She is a regular guest on The Savage Nation, The Rusty Humphries Show, The Steve Malzberg Show, The Drew Mariani Show and Wake Up Monterey with Mark Carbonaro,among many other programs. She is the Washington D.C. Correspondent for Freedom Fridays with Carl Gallups (on air every week at 6:00 p.m. Eastern).

My GUESS is, she spent a little time with Deputy Mike “The Arizona Kid” Zullo of the Cold Case Posse and caught a raging case of The Pixel Pox. We know she was exposed to him because in her piece she writes:

During our interview, Lt. Zullo narrated his encounter in Hawaii on May 21, 2012 with Deputy Attorney General Jill Nagamine, who after repeated questions, failed to confirm the document released by the president is the same as any that might exist in their records.

Nope, you don’t catch The Pixel Pox from a toilet seat. She was messing where she shouldn’t have been messing, and now she has that drooling thing going on. And the messed up thought processes.  Deputy Zullo caught it from spending 16 hours with Jerome Corsi, and now poor Grace has disease.

Here’s how it happens. First, there is a prolonged period of mindless babbling about kerning and smiley faces, and TXE’s and layers, and rasters. This lowers a person’s resistance because to tell the truth, most of us don’t know anything about all that stuff. So, the poor victim just sits there and nods their head up and down in agreement so they don’t look stupid. Then, while the brains are being shaken, not stirred, KERWHAPP!!! Next thing you know the poor fool is infected and the drool starts slobbering out of the mouth and the sympathetic babbling starts.

This occurred because the victims attention was being focused on pixels, not on the big picture. Because the big picture is, that you can’t tell if an online image is forged or not unless there is some inherent contradiction or anomaly with the information itself. For example, if the Registrar is “Mickey Mouse” or something like that, or the fonts are something not invented at the relevant time. That’s why I call it, The Pixel Pox – an overemphasis on the little picture.

Luckily, there is a cure. First, until you get inoculated, avoid all contact with Birthers. Start reading the Obot and Anti-Birther websites like Fogbow, Obama Conspiracy Theories, and others. There you can get to the unvarnished truth about what is going on. And learn how to start laughing at the Birthers. A sufferer can also do Cognitive Self-Therapy. For example, Vuoto could ask herself questions like this:

1. Does the fact a group of people can’t figure out how an image of a  document was uploaded to the Internet, prove that the document itself was forged?

2. Is there any information on the image which has been shown to be false?

3. Why did Deputy Zullo say there wasn’t enough evidence to convict Obama of jaywalking, much less anything else???

Doing this will help cure The Pixel Pox. There is another cure, but it is much more painful. It happens when people you respect begin whispering “She’s a crazy f*cking Birther!” behind your back. And your readers begin soliciting your opinion on the fake Moon Landings. And editors and producers quit calling you.

Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that for Ms. Vuoto.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Image. This is from the 1959 Oscar winning film, The Alligator People. Wiki says, in part:

 The Alligator People is a 1959 science fiction horror film directed by Roy Del Ruth. It stars Beverly Garland, Bruce Bennett and Lon Chaney Jr.

After she is administered the drug pentothal by psychiatrists Dr. Erik Lorimer and Dr. Wayne McGregor, nurse Jane Marvin recalls a series events from her forgotten past when she was known as Joyce Webster.

The next morning, Mark [a local doctor/mad scientist] summons Joyce to his lab and tells her about his experiments with reptilian hormones that are capable of regenerating limbs. He continues that after Paul was horribly mangled in a plane crash, Mark administered the serum to him and several other accident victims. The treatment appeared to be a great success, until his patients began to take on reptilian traits at increasing rates. Mark explains that after Paul received the telegram notifying him that his tests were positive, he hurriedly left the train and came home in hopes of reversing his condition. When Joyce learns of Paul’s scheduled radical cobalt treatment, she insists on being present.

That night, Paul encounters Joyce at the clinic and turns away from her in shame. After seeing Joyce clasps her son’s hands and reassures him of her love, Lavinia apologizes to her for her brusqueness. As Paul climbs onto the table and Mark aims the ray at him, Mannon bursts into the lab and destroys the control panel, shooting powerful rays at Paul that transform him into bipedal, reptilian monster with an alligator like head. After trying to attack Mannon, Paul looks on as Mannon’s hook is caught on some cords and is electrocuted to death while trying to attack Paul. Confused, Paul stumbled over to the other room and tries to communicate, but his voice has been replaced with a crocodilian snarl. Hearing his wife and mother scream in horror, Paul flees into the swamps and sadly peering into the water, sees his reflection. Joyce scrambles after him, as the cobalt machine, short circuiting due to Mannon’s body; self destructs and destroys the lab. Scrambling away from his wife, Paul is attacked by and wrestles an alligator while Joyce screams at the sight. Managing to fight off and hurling the reptile away, Paul stumbles into quicksand and slowly sinks out of sight to the sound of Joyce’s shrieks.

Back in the present, the psychiatrists review the tapes of Joyce’s ordeal and, concluding that her amnesia has allowed her to suppress the horror and resume a normal life, they decide not to tell her about her life as Joyce Webster.

Note 2. For ESL’s. A Crock is a Word Play. A Croc is short name for a crocodile. A crock, is an earthenware jar which was frequently used as a chamber pot in days gone by. It is frequently used in the phrase “a crock of sh*t”

crock4 (krɒk)

n. Slang.
something false or exaggerated; humbug.
[1955–60; orig. unclear, though often taken as a euphemism for a crock of shit]

Random House Kernerman Webster’s College Dictionary, © 2010 K Dictionaries Ltd. Copyright 2005, 1997, 1991 by Random House, Inc. All rights reserved.

Whither The Butterdezillion Emails???

typist flu-typist

Planning Ahead, She Was Careful Not To Get Her DNA On The Email

Well, today I learned from Bob at the Fogbow that Butterdezillion is having computer bo-bos, again. To wit:

butterdezillion wrote:Somebody stole some emails that I sent to Mike Zullo. I had to send them to a 3rd party and have him forward them, in order to get them to Mike. An IT-professor friend told me that could only happen at the Homeland Security level.

I KNOW they are messing with the investigation. I have experienced it personally. Add obstruction of justice to the list of crimes by this regime, on this issue alone.


Of course we already know that the NSA is monitoring everything she does to help develop weaponized illogic bombs to destroy our enemies’ computers. (see yesterdays post), but I have it on good authority that in this case, her emails were simply intercepted by Deputy Zullo’s spam filter. Here is a copy of one of the emails:

To:  deputy.zullo@possegalore.com

From: butterdezillion@gee!mail.com

Subject: indirect confirmation of me

I believe Bacterin has the opportunity to use these facilities in school PE. Have a shitty rest of your life? To understand, you
can still talk about the good stuff. Yoga offers a myriad of wellness tennis elbow treatment prevention benefits: flexibility, balance, vision and a sublime finish to score a goal because I dread to think what is needed to protect the Eastern Gulf of Mexico.

I have others, but I have to be careful here about letting too much of my secret stuff loose.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Message. OK, so this didn’t really come from Butterdezillion. It is just one of the spam comments I got yesterday. But it was so damn weird that I had to find a way to get it out there in public. This piece of spam is so bad, that it morphs into an ARTFORM! Plus, I would have gotten busted out anyway because  this makes way too much sense to be from Butterdezillion.

Note 2. The Image. This is a picture of a nurse typing during the 1918 Flu Pandemic. Which also explains the Easter Egg pun.

The Mad Moldovan Versus Deputy Dork!!! (The Taitz v. Zullo Grudge Match)


Zullo Being Tormented By The Moldovan Crab!!!

Every spring, as the saps rise across the country, the Birthers seem to get feisty and fidgety.  There is always an undercurrent of struggle, much like animals competing for food. But it seems to intensify in the spring. They begin quarreling and fighting with each other in earnest. The male Birthers develop a strange desire to dominate and suppress the female Birthers. I would not be surprised if there was some kind of primitive rutting behavior going on.

In 2009, it was Philip Berg versus Orly Taitz:


In February 2010, it was Taitz against her former para-legal Charles Lincoln and his witness, Lucas Smith:


In 2011, there was a quiet spell. I think maybe all the Donald Trump rumblings and subsequent April 27, 2011 release of Obama’s long form birth certificate quieted the herd down. If I were doing active field research, I would hypothesize that Donald Trump took on the role of Alpha Male, and the other male Birthers backed down in submission.

Last spring,  the feuding came back to life with a vengeance. This was the Orly Taitz-Dean Haskins kerfluffle.  See the 4-Part Birther Feud Trilogy which started here:


That conflict saw an active schism develop between the ObamaReleaseYourRecords Sophisticate Sect, and the Orly Taitz Raving Fundamentalists. Now, internecine conflict has erupted again. The PPSimmons blog has fired several rounds into Taitz on behalf of Zullo and crew. Here are several examples:

Has Orly Taitz “Stepped In It?” BHO Operative? Inept? … Or National Hero?

Here is the test. For a few months now – some have speculated that Orly Taitz may, in fact, be an Obama operative. They maintain that Orly has filed numerous cases and lost everyone while at the same time claiming to be the “world’s leading authority” in the matter. Her efforts have led, they say, to an ever increasing marginalization of real Obama identity fraud investigations. The fact that she continually calls for Arpaio and Zullo to “file charges” when she, as an attorney and world expert, should know that doing so would devastate the case in a legal sense, many believe is evidence that Taitz may be working for the other side. Why, many have asked, would the world’s leading expert and attorney continually push losing cases before federal courts only to make the birthers look more and more inept? Hmmm. Yes – why? indeed.

We at PPSIMMONS wish Orly “God-speed” in this matter. If she wins this case – we will loudly blow the trumpet for Orly Taitz and thank her profusely. But, alas, we don’t think that is going to happen.

So… is Orly Taitz an Obama operative? Is she merely an inept attorney desperately seeking fame and fortune, as some have suggested? … Or is she a national hero?  We hope and pray she is proven to be the latter. At this point though, the evidence doesn’t point that way.  Stay tuned…


And this one,  which I really suspect is pheromone based:

Orly Taitz? “I smell a rat” says PPSIMMONS Contributor

By Chris Farrell

Question: I am convinced that Atty. Orly Taitz is an Obama plant; an agent working to get out in front of any given dimension of the eligibility issue and derail its progress in the courts and diffuse its truthful dissemination in the media.

Could what appears to be an advance in the District of Columbia wherein Orly is proceeding in court against the Social Security numbers that have been employed by Mister Obama/Soetoro/Soebarkah/Bounel be a subversive effort at getting out in front of the evidence and destroying its credibility–an effort on the part of the Obama camp to achieve a ruling against such evidence as credible that will undermine the presentation of any related evidence presented in front of the Alabama Supreme Court where Atty. Larry Klayman is reported to, at some time in the future, present the evidence uncovered by Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s volunteer Cold Case Posse including evidence related to Mister Obama’s fraudulent Social Security numbers?

Could Atty. Taitz’ presentation of the evidence surrounding Mister Obama’s fraudulent Social Security Numbers be nothing less than a managing by a covert agent working for Obama’s team of the public portrayal in the media of such evidence as unreliable? A close look at her presentation of the evidence will tell.
In other words: Is Atty. Taitz managing the defeat of such evidence by means of weakly presenting the evidence in such a fashion which permits its defeat as legitimate in the D.C. courtroom, thus undermining any future–as in its introduction before the Alabama State Supreme Court–presentation of the evidence or news reporting on any such presentation?

Orly Taitz, a second degree black belt in Taekwondo, is no Shy Violet, and has fired quite a few broadsides, herself. She will not back down.

I feel like the law enforcement people putting bets on the maniac treasure hunters in It’s A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World.  I guess it comes with the territory. So, my money is on Taitz! She has the legs to see this thing through to the end.  Zullo and his boys haven’t made it to court once in over a year. They are great at standing around and crowing, but when it comes to putting pencil to paper and doing something, they all seem to have other places to be.

Plus, Taitz can do her own dirty work. She doesn’t need to fight through mouthpieces. So, let’s get ready to rumble!

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. The Wrestling Hold.  Taitz has Zullo in the Moldovan Crab hold. This  is a Rocking Horse variation of the Reverse Boston Crab.


The Moldovan Crab variation was perfected by Gypsies in the late 1700’s as a way to immobilize a victim, while an accomplice picked their pockets. Taitz, a student of Krav Maga, viciously utilizes her body weight against Zullo’s hamstrings rather than merely locking his legs with hers.  If Zullo had pockets in his wrestling costume, his wallet and valuables would be ripe pickings. This video shows the less advanced variation of this technique as utilized by Cassidy Riley against AJ Styles.

It is unlikely Zullo will be able to overcome the damage done by the hold, his legs having been effectively cut out from under him. While he may not lose his wallet, he will be physically incapable of soliciting funds for a considerable length of time.

Note 2. Intergender Wrestling: Some people may not believe that Intergender Wrestling actually occurs as an organized activity outside of bedrooms and back seats, but as this video clearly shows, it was an established sport by 1981. Mr. Andrew Kaufman, who may or may not be dead,  was the first champion. He can be distinguished from Deputy Zullo above by his lack of a mustache. Here is his match against The Red Snapper!

Note 3. Sexual Components of Intergender Wrestling.: Actually, Intergender Wrestling has a long history, with and without sexual components. Time and space limit the discussion to Andrew Kaufman who, as reported by Brian Nemtusak:

Zmuda set up Kaufman’s first private wrestling match in 1978, actually a contest between two female friends based on a rumor that Elvis had a wrestling fetish. Kaufman ended up wrestling and sleeping with one of them, which would become the formula for hundreds of subsequent conquests. Zmuda and Kaufman soon incorporated “intergender wrestling” into Kaufman’s act, initially on college tours and then on SNL. Neither author makes excuses for Kaufman–for him, wrestling was a turn-on and, even in the context of his show, a shtick for getting laid. (Midway through most matches Kaufman would invite his opponent to join him after the show, and according to Zmuda about a third of them weren’t hard to convince; eventually Kaufman would install a wrestling mat next to his bed.) But wrestling was also another childhood passion that perfectly matched his choreographed fakery and manufactured conflict, well suited to stoking the audience’s scorn. Only the sexist goading was entirely phony, yet it polarized his fans as never before and generated a backlash that would only begin with demands that Kaufman wrestle a man.


Obama Of Arabia Outflanks Cold Case Posse!!!

lawrence final

The KGB Helped Obama Escape Into The Desert, One Step Ahead Of A Traffic Ticket

Well, one of the latest rumors is that Obama is a Saudi. That one came from Sheriff Mark “Big Iron” Kessler of Fracktown, PA, who supposedly got it straight from the Cold Case Posse’s lips. Here is what we learned before Kessler decided he wasn’t part of the “birther deal” any more:

Kessler's Cold Case Posse Info

(Click On Image To Make Larger.)

Now Kessler supposedly learned this at the June 1, 2013 Constitutional Sheriffs and Peace Officers Convention in St. Charles, Missouri. Let’s examine the rumors a little more closely, and what he was told VIA cold case possie:

1) Bozo isn’t American nor was he born in Hawaii;

2) They believe he’s Saudi;

3) Their not his real parents;

4) Russia is involved;

5) It wasn’t an accident he’s President;

6) Bill Ayers and the weather underground are involved;

7) Kenya played a role, Hawaii state officials did the birth certificate;

8) He has several other names , not just the ones the public knows about;

9) He doesn’t exist in the USA until the age of 5…..


Now most of those are just variations of one sort or the other on previous rumors. But No.10 really bothered me. What in the world did the CCP mean when they told Kessler, “WE’RE ALL F*CKED”??? Then it hit me. Maybe they were talking about themselves, not the country. Maybe it is the Cold Case Posse which is “F*CKED.” Because, this little tidbit came out a few days later as a result of the Taitz-Zullo-Gallups kerfluffle:

Zullo said Taitz “apparently… doesn’t understand what jurisdiction means” because Obama “has not committed a crime in Maricopa County or the state of Arizona regarding his Social Security number.”

“I know [Taitz] had 20-some-odd court cases on this very issue and maybe now she’s feeling very threatened,” Zullo said. “There is not enough evidence to convict him on jaywalking … let alone anything else.”

But Zullo said he is seeking a congressional hearing to remove the president from office.


Zullo said this in a video, which is also at the link in case you want to hear it out of his own mouth. But isn’t this kind of THE SMOKING GUN??? Because when you are conducting a criminal investigation, and you don’t have enough evidence to convict him on jaywalking … let alone anything else doesn’t that mean NOT GUILTY???

Yep. I would say Deputy Zullo and The Cold Case Posse are, in their words,  F*CKED.

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

OMG!!! Deputy Zullo and The Space Posse Tackle The Moon Landing Hoax???

space posse 2

Obviously, Zullo And The Space Posse’s Investigation Lacked Gravity

OMG, I just got a document purporting to be between document examiner Reed Hayes and Deputy Mike Zullo of the Cold Case Posse. Apparently, Sheriff Joe Arpaio has decided to sic the posse on the alleged Moon Landing Hoax. The new investigatory posse is called The Maricopa County Space Posse.

I am not sure I believe this one, but as always, I report and YOU decide. I wouldn’t have thought the goobers would ever investigate Obama’s birth certificate, so who knows??? First, here is a pdf upload I made of the 5 page document:

ReadRight Document

Next, here is a page by page image post, for those without a pdf reader. Click on any Image to make it larger:
Page 1:


Page 2:

Page 3:

Page 4:

Page 5:

My goodness. There was a time when I would have had no questions about the authenticity of the above. But then I met the Birthers. . .

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1: PDF Images:  Here are the actual jpegs that were in the non-pdf document I received. I am not sure if the trfr to pdf changed the aspects or not.


Moon Bats Hanging


Moon Bat Shaking


Moon Bat Releasing

Reed Hayes And The Crapomite Maneuver!!!


In Hindsight, They Probably Should Have Realized He Was Just A Big Dummy

Well, if you have never seen The Corbomite Maneuver from the first season of the original Star Trek TV series, then SPOILERS! Don’t read any further!

Now, for those of you are are still here, this is what Wiki says about the episode:

On stardate 1512.2, the Federation starship USS Enterprise, commanded by Captain James T. Kirk, finishes a third day of mapping stars, when novice navigator Lt. Dave Bailey (Anthony Call) spots a large spinning colored cube floating in space. Kirk arrives and orders the ship to back away from the object. The cube responds by coming even closer and emitting harmful radiation, and Kirk destroys it.

In the midst of a series of attack drills, Spock informs the Captain that a much larger object is rapidly approaching.

Responding to the object’s destruction – which the crew soon learn was a boundary marker – a gigantic glowing sphere quickly approaches the Enterprise. It fills the bridge viewscreen, even at low magnification. The vessel’s controller, Commander Balok, identifies his ship as the Fesarius, the flagship of the “First Federation”.

Mr. Spock manages to get a visual of Balok, a grotesque, blue-skinned humanoid with a frightening face. Balok ignores Kirk’s greetings, and announces that he will destroy the Enterprise for trespassing into First Federation territory and destroying the marker buoy. Balok informs the crew they have ten minutes to pray to their deities before their demise.

Mr. Spock compares the situation to a game of chess: “In chess, when one player is outmatched, the game is over.” He regrets that he can find no logical answer. Kirk replies that the solution is not chess, but poker. He bluffs, telling Balok that the Enterprise has incorporated into it a protective substance known as Corbomite which, when the ship is attacked, creates an equal force rebounding on the attacker.

Apparently falling for the ruse, Balok does not destroy the ship as previously announced. Afterward, Balok makes direct contact with the Enterprise, requesting details on the Corbomite device. After allowing sufficient time, mostly to cause Balok to worry the details, Kirk refuses.

A tug ship then detaches from the Fesarius and tows the Enterprise deep into First Federation space, where Balok announces he will intern the crew and destroy the Enterprise. Under tow, Kirk orders the Enterprise to increasingly resist the tug ship’s tractor beam. Just as the Enterprise’s engines are about to explode from the overload, it breaks free. This disables the alien vehicle.

Rather than flee, Kirk, McCoy, and Bailey form a boarding party to render assistance. Spock remains on the Enterprise to assist them, in case this was a trap. Scott, operating the transporter, tells them to bend down, as the scan on the alien ship reveals it has a very low ceiling. Upon arrival they discover that the “Balok” who appeared on their monitor is just a dummy, and the real Balok resembles a hyperintelligent human child. He enthusiastically welcomes them aboard, offering them “tranya”, his favorite beverage.

Balok explains that he was merely testing the Enterprise and its crew, to discover their true intentions. Although he had read the Enterprise computer records, he felt they could have been a deception. He created his dummy alter-ego, as he knew his true appearance would never frighten anyone.

Everybody lives happily ever after. This is what I suspect is going on with Reed Hayes, the document expert for Deputy Zullo and the Cold Case Posse.  First, no report from Hayes has been presented either in court or in any of Zullo’s numerous appearances.  If such a report even exists, then it must be pure crap or it would have already surfaced.

Sheriff Joe Arpaio and the Posse have already tried to get prosecutor Bill Montgomery to prosecute Obama, and he refused for lack of evidence. A copy of the refusal is in Note 1., below. If the Cold Case Posse had a report from Hayes, and presented it, then it obviously did not contain enough to permit prosecution.  If the Cold Case Posse had such a bang-up report, and did not present it to the prosecutor,  just prior to the presidential election, then there is something else going on between Obama and Arpaio, such as been alleged by Orly Taitz. In that case,  the report will probably never see the light of day.

Post presidential election, there have been numerous chances for Zullo to present the report, and no particular reason to prolong the process. Zullo has gotten egg on his face for his numerous statements that all legal hell is about to break loose, and then there is nothing but the sound of crickets. His credibility is suffering.

Just a few days ago on June 1, 2013, Zullo spoke before the Constitutional Sheriffs and Peace Officers Convention in St. Charles, Missouri. Supposedly they were shocked and awed by what they heard. They may have actually had the chance to go into full seizure mode if there was a credible report from Hayes. I don’t think there is any kind of explosive report sitting out there, or it would already have been detonated.

Second, I don’t see Reed Hayes risking professional Hari-Kari by becoming known as that Birther document guy. Imagine Hayes has just recited all his credentials for a jury, and gives his opinion and then. . . opposing counsel gets up and asks, “Hey, aren’t you the same expert who said President Obama’s long form birth certificate was a forgery???” That’s when a judge has to give his Everybody STFU! or I’ll clear the courtroom! speech because of all the laughter.

Unless the rent  was due, or the pantry was bare, I don’t see Hayes putting any of this silliness down in writing in any big way. You might get a little speculative musing that falls far short of accusing Obama, or his handlers, of forgery. Which brings us to the final reason why I think this whole thing is a Crapomite Maneuver, where Zullo and the Gang are trying to get as much mileage as possible from a pile of crap. That is, Zullo has already tipped his hand about what he has, and what input he got from Reed Hayes.

From FreeRepublic, we learn that on June 1, 2013, Zullo said:

Some of the anomalies that we have pointed out today were first discovered by a certified document examiner named Reed Hayes.

Mr. Hayes conclusion after examining Barack Obama’s long form birth certificate pretty much says it all. Mr Hayes says that: ‘In over 20 years of examining documentation of various types I have never seen a document that is so seriously questionable in so many respects. In my opinion the birth certificate is entirely fabricated.'”


Oh WOW! I am all in a tizzy! NOT!!!  Again, no report has been presented to back up this claim, and Hayes hasn’t even seen the actual long form birth certificate. All he has seen is a PICTURE of it on a computer screen. Sooo, there are some anomalies on a computer picture. Did somebody violate the Online Picture Anomaly Act???  Did someone cross state lines to perform an act of Incompetent Uploading???

Nothing new here. Same old crap we have been looking  at for months.  Meanwhile, Captain Zullo struts around with, “I got an expert! I got an expert!”, and all the time he is holding 5 crummy cards, with an 8 high. I call the bluff. Go ahead Zullo and pull the Crapomite Maneuver. Just do it outside, and take a bar of soap with you. I’ll turn the water hose on you to clean off all the crap. With the nozzle set to “sting.”

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. Refusal To Prosecute. This is from the ObamaReleaseYourRecords website:

Arizona Refusal To Prosecute

(Click On Image To Make Larger.)

The Birther Cotillion (Or, Coming Out In Phoenix!!!)

No Matter How Hard They Tried To Pass As Normal, The Birthers Could Never Quite Pull It Off

Talk about deja vu.  According to Stephen Lemon’s blog at the Phoenix New Times, the Birthers are planning a gala event on September 22, 2012 in Phoenix, Az:

Here is a link to the full Internet Article, which is pretty funny:

Stephen Lemon’s Blog at Phoenix New Times

Many Birther Celebs are going to be there, including Pat Boone, who will probably sing one of his No.1 hits,  “I Almost Lost My Mind”  no doubt rubbing it in on Terry Lakin and other Birthers who, unlike Boone, went all the way.

Anyway, here is what I think is behind this event, besides the chance to goose Obama, rack up photo-fees,  sell books, and pick up votes and Birther chicks.  I believe the Birthers are trying to pass themselves off as normal and rid themselves of that crazy as a sh*thouse mouse stigma. Which rather colorful term is defined by The Urban Dictionary as “an incomprehensibly crazy person”  and warns the term is “not used to describe a spell of psychotic behavior. A sh*thouse mouse is permanently insane.”

Sooo, you put a famous singer up on the stage, along with a real-live big city (county) high sheriff, a film producer, and few people who actually wrote books. Now, the average Birther can pretend he or she isn’t really all that stupid after all.  After all, famous rich people who can read and write believe this Birther stuff.

That’s my take on it – – – a big coming-out party, where the Birthers can pretend to be sane and weasel themselves into polite society. If they can get Donald Trump, and few more generals and naval officers there, they may pull it off.  Look for the Tea Party people there to be totally upstaged by the wild Birthers.

Meanwhile, don’t look for Mitt Romney to be there. He will be face-palming himself along with Ann Coulter, Mark Levin, and Rush Limbaugh, while they pray for the Ghost Of Bill Buckley to rise from the grave and rid the party of these idiots. After the election.

This ought to be a hoot, particularly if  backwoods Birthers and Sovereign Sitizens show up drunk with guns, muskets, pink dildoes, and various artillery pieces.  The bouncers are sure going to have a time keeping Riff Raff out.

Hmmm. I wonder if the aluminum foil concession is still available???

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1. Cotillion:  Originally a dance with prescribed routines and steps. Wiki says:

The cotillion is a type of patterned social dance that originated in France in the 18th century. It was originally made up of four couples in a square formation, the forerunner of the quadrille; in the United States the square dance, where the “figures” are called aloud by the caller, is a form of rural contredanse that also descended from the urban cotillion. Its name, from French cotillon, “petticoat“, reflected the flash of petticoats as the changing partners turned.

The cotillion, of repeated “figures” interspersed with “changes” of different figures to different music, was one of many contredanses where the gathered participants were able to introduce themselves and to flirt with other dancers through the exchange of partners within the formation network of the dance. By the 19th century, the cotillion evolved to include more couples with many complex dance figures.

In modern usage, a Cotillion is usually a highly formal coming out affair, again as Wiki says:

In American usage, a cotillion is a formal ball and social gathering, often the venue for presenting débutantes during the débutante season – usually May through December. Cotillions are also used as classes to teach social etiquette, respect and common morals for the younger ages with the possibility of leading up to a débutante ball.

Debut presentations vary by regional culture and are also frequently referenced as “debutante balls,” “cotillion balls” or “coming-out” parties. The male equivalent is often referred to as “beautillion ball”.

A cotillion or débutante ball in the United States is a formal presentation of young ladies, débutantes, to “polite society”. Wearing white gowns and satin or kid gloves, the débutantes stand in a receiving line, and then are introduced individually to the audience. The débutante is announced and then is walked around the stage, guided by her father who then presents her. Her younger male escort then joins her and escorts her away. Each débutante brings at least one escort, sometimes two. Many débutante balls select escorts and then pair them with the debs to promote good social pairings. Every débutante must perform a curtsy also known as the St. James Bow or a full court bow. This gesture is made as the young woman is formally presented. Débutante balls exist in nearly every major city in the United States but are more common and a larger affair in the South.

As a side note, pre-Cotillion virginity tests were phased out in the 1960’s for some unknown reason.

Note 2. The Image. This is a still from the 1975 film version of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, where Dr. Frank-N-Furter shot the notion of natural born citizen all to Hell and back.  The tap dancer is “Columbia” played by Little Nell.  The Easter Egg begins with a line from “Hail Columbia“, also known as The President’s March and once considered a National Anthem, until 1931. Now, it is the entry music for the Vice-President. The actual part of the song goes, in tribute to George Washington:

When hope was sinking in dismay,
When glooms obscured Columbia’s day,
His steady mind, from changes free,
Resolved on death or liberty

Note 3. Bonus. Occasional Music from The Rocky Horror Picture Show, performed acoustically:

Squeeky Deposes Deputy Zullo!!! (Video!!!)

Here is the latest GirlReporter Film Production!!!  If riveting legal drama and intense intellectual combat are your cup of tea, be sure not to miss:

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Arpaio’s F Bomb Is A Dud!!! (The Obama Forgery Test)

Arpaio Was Well Known For His Short Fuse

Sheriff Joe, Deputy Zullo, Jerome “Jerry” Corsi, and other Birthers have been dropping F Bombs left and right since the initial March 12, 2012 press conference. “F” here stands for “Forgery.”  On July 17, 2012, Arpaio held another press conference and doubled-down on the forgery claim.  Meanwhile, outside the Birther Asylum, and the Anti-Birther Butterfly-Net Shore Patrol,  the whole issue is a dud.

The Birther Press is busy chest-thumping like two horny male gorillas about the lack of Main Stream Press coverage, and pouting like little snotty-nosed kids because the Conservative Big Shots, like Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck, don’t want to play with them. Maybe it is the whole snot-thing???

Others, like Dr. Orly Taitz, Esq. and numerous Freeper Birfers, are filled with indignation because the saner part of the universe simply ignores Arpaio and the Cold Case Posse’s claims of forgery. Sooo, I have decided to deconstruct the issue and get down to specifics. First, let us get a workable definition of forgery. This one, from the Free Legal Dictionary, seems typical:

The creation of a false written document or alteration of a genuine one, with the intent to defraud.

Forgery consists of filling in blanks on a document containing a genuine signature, or materially altering or erasing an existing instrument. An underlying intent to defraud, based on knowledge of the false nature of the instrument, must accompany the act.

Since the word defraud is used twice, let’s define that word also, from the same source:

[T]o use deceit, falsehoods, or trickery to obtain money, an object, rights or anything of value belonging to another.

Legally, any erroneous information would have to have been put in, or altered,  with the intent to defraud, so that simple clerical errors or harmless mistakes would not constitute forgery. For example, if a clerk penciled in the number “9” for the Father’s Race, when the correct code should have been “2”, there is no forgery.  Mainly, because there was no evil intent and no one is being defrauded of anything.

Suppose Obama’s real father was Frank Marshall Davis, and not Barack Obama Sr., and Stanley Dunham did not know this, perhaps having slept with both men. Then there would be no forgery. There is no intent to defraud. If, on the other hand, she knew that Frank Marshall Davis (FMD) was the actual father, but listed BO, Sr. as the father anyway, then there would be forgery, of a sort, by the creation of a false document.

But even then, the intent to defraud somebody would have to be proven.  It is possible that FMD and BO, Sr. could have agreed to such a listing.  Or, if by supplying false information, Stanley Dunham sought to obtain something of value, either money or some right, then there could have been an intent to defraud. The important thing is that the intent to defraud has to be proven, not just assumed.

By definition, any alteration would have to be legally material, that is  significant and important, to fit within the definition of forgery. For example, if someone altered the place of birth from Kenya to Hawaii, that would be material. If someone enhanced a barely legible letter, to make it more legible, that would be probably be immaterial. Either way, an intent to defraud would still have to be proven.

All right, now that we have a workable definition of forgery and the intent to defraud and material, let’s look at the online long form:

Remember, that the Hawaii DOH says a long form exists, so unless some information has been added, erased, or changed from that original, then there is no forgery. Mere non-material alteration is NOT forgery. I went through the document and here is a list of 43 items which constitute the information contained on the online document:

File Number 151 on top

Certificate Number 61 10641 on top

Green Security Paper Background

Apr 25 2011 stamped on bottom

Certification on bottom with handwritten Alvin T. Onaka, Ph.D. and stamped State Registrar

1a. Child’s First Name – Barack

1b. Child’s Middle Name – Hussein

1c. Child’s Last Name – Obama, II

2. Sex – Male

3. This Birth – single block marked (as opposed to twin or triplet) and two “x’s” and a “dash” penciled in.

4. If Twin or Triplets Was Child Born 1st, 2nd, 3rd – No Information Entered

5a. Birth Date – August 4, 1961

5b. Hour – 7:24 PM

6a. Place of Birth (City) –  Honolulu

6b. Island – Oahu

6c. Name of Hospital – Kapiolani Maternity & Gynecological Hospital

6d. Is Place of Birth Inside City Limits – Yes block is marked.

7a. Usual Residence of Mother (City) – Honolulu

7b. Island – Oahu

7c. County and State – Honolulu, Hawaii

7d. Street Address – 6085 Kalanianaole Highway

7e. Is Residence Inside City Limits – Yes blocked is marked

7f. Mother’s Mailing Address – No Information Entered

7g. Is Residence Inside City Limits – Yes block is marked and number “2” is penciled in.

8. Full Name of Father – Barack Hussein Obama

9. Race of Father – African and number “9” is penciled in.

10. Age of Father – 25

11. Birthplace – Kenya, East Africa and number “2” is penciled in.

12a. Usual Occupation – Student and a “dash” and a “o” are penciled in.

12b. Kind of Business or Occupation – University and number “9” is penciled in.

13. Full Maiden Name of Mother – Stanley Ann Dunham

14. Race of Mother – Caucasian and number “1” is penciled in.

15. Age of Mother – 18

16. Birthplace – Wichita, Kansas and an “a” (?) is penciled in.

17a. Type of Occupation Outside Home During Pregnancy – None and a “0” is penciled in.

17b. Date Last Worked – No Information Entered and a “0” is penciled in.

18a. Signature of Parent – Handwritten (Stanley) Ann Dunham Obama, with block checked for Parent.

18b. Date of Signature – Handwritten 8-7-61

19a. Signature of Attendant – Handwritten David A. Sinclair with M.D. block checked.

20. Date Accepted by Local Registrar – Stamped August 8, 1961

21. Signature of Local Registrar – Handwritten V K L Lee

22. Date Accepted by Reg. General – Stamped August 9 – 1961

23. Evidence for Delayed Filing or Alteration – No Information Entered

Now, for the Crickets Test.

Question 1:  Which item(s) of information above has been substantially proven by The Cold Case Posse to  be an alteration of a genuine item,  that is, information materially altered (changed, added, or erased) and different from the original long form birth certificate???

Answer: Crickets.

Question 2:  Which item(s) of information above has been substantially proven by The Cold Case Posse to be false from the very creation of an original document???

Answer: Crickets.

Question 3:  Which item(s) of information above has been substantially proven by The Cold Case Posse to constitute any intent to defraud some other person and obtain some benefit???

Answer: Crickets.

Question 4:  Notwithstanding any other question and/or answer, which item(s) of information above has been substantially proven by The Cold Case Posse to constitute a legally material alteration of any original information???

Answer: Crickets

I would submit that Sheriff Joe, Deputy Zullo, The Cold Case Posse, Jerome “Jerry” Corsi, and other Birthers have completely and utterly failed to prove any of the elements of a forgery claim. Not only have they failed to substantially prove any of the forgery elements, they have not even made a credible  allegation of any element of forgery.

The closest they have come is to argue that the penciled in “9” in the Race of Father block, is either incorrect, or should have resulted in an empty block.  Which is at least debatable, and factually incorrect in my opinion.

Yet even on that point, there has been no proof offered that the original long form document did not have such an entry.Additionally,  and even if they were correct, they have offered no evidence which shows any intent to defraud anyone, nor have they even bothered to hazard a theory how such an boo-boo could tend to defraud anyone.

Are they truly so incompetent that they fail to realize any of this,  or do they just not care???

Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter

Note 1:  Here is a separate PDF of the Obama Forgery Test to better help you snare the unwary Birther. Feel free to use it and distribute it.

The Obama Forgery Test